Monday, August 13, 2012

My Grandmother's Legacy

I am part of a prayer group, and each Sunday I reflect on and pray about Heaven. I've been thinking of Heaven a lot lately, and my grandmother's passing last week has only further fueled my ponderings.

At my grandmother's funeral, her brother-in-law (a preacher) talked about the generations she has left behind, the legacy of Lola Bell—it is a fine legacy. We have some oddities here and there, but we are all believers raising our families in Christ, and that is something my grandmother was proud of. 

Her brother-in-law also talked about my grandmother's little girl, who died after only a few hours of life, and how they will get to be reunited. And a couple people at the funeral mentioned that we are sad because we will miss her presence in our life—not because of any fear about her being gone forever.

I feel Heaven is something I struggle with, to be honest with you all—my grandmother has been in decline for a while, and I've wished Heaven for her—so I know that my deep heart knows there is a Heaven, a place I knew she could go and finally have peace again. But lately the idea of getting old feels threatening to me rather than welcoming. My knee is bothering me and may need surgery, my grandmother passed (my third grandparent to leave this earth), and I turn 30 this year. My mortality seems so real.

But there is immortality in Christ. My prayer right now, today...this week, is for us to have an unshakeable faith in knowing of that immortality, and a peace that grows from that—and lives that reflect that knowledge and press to share the peace and hope of our Savior.

My grandmother's life has also made me think a lot lately about how to make this true in my life: "this is my story, this is my song: praising my Savior all the day long" (Fanny Crosby). The song is "Blessed Assurance," which is one of the things I want most in life. So does the chorus give us the secret: that giving our lives to Christ will give us the assurance of His love and presence and of Heaven, which is the ultimate example of His love (in that His death makes it possible for us to go there)?

Married for 61 years, faithfully following my preaching grandfather through various mission fields as a united team, Lola Bell Carter Hilliard was an excellent example to me of giving her life away. The past two weeks I've felt her spirit pushing me to do the same. I haven't figured out exactly how God wishes me to do so, but I am spending the entire week in prayer for my purpose to become obvious to me. I've come to these truths so far:

  1)    I need to give thanks more.
ü  Give glory to God in everything you do, giving thanks (Colossians 3:17). 
ü  Don't be anxious: bring everything to God in thanksgiving (Philippians 4:6).
  2)    I need to look outward more than inward, finding ways to help others in quietness and   kindness.
ü  Love others as I have loved you, and in this action, people will know you are Mine (John 13:34-35).

I am resolved no longer to linger,
Charmed by the world’s delight,
Things that are higher, things that are nobler,
These have allured my sight.

I will hasten to Him, hasten so glad and free;
Jesus, greatest, highest, I will come to Thee.
I will hasten, hasten to Him, hasten so glad and free;
Jesus, Jesus, greatest, highest, I will come to Thee.

Palmer Hartsough

I keep hearing I look like her: the only better compliment I can think of is hearing I am like her. She was true beauty.

this post is linked up with
The Alabaster Jar

1 comment:

  1. What a sweet tribute to your lovely look-alike grandmother. I pray for your comfort in this loss.