tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-40932230774700441322024-02-06T22:06:54.976-06:00here.herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.comBlogger62125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-55480574819646264842014-06-10T14:39:00.001-05:002014-06-10T17:04:12.774-05:00Away They Go: 10 Tips and Tricks for Trimming off Post-Pregnancy Pounds<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I’m tired of wearing maternity clothes: my baby is now 2.5
months old. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know I’m not going to drop down to my pre-pregnancy weight in the
next two weeks, but I am ready to make a purposeful movement—a two week
challenge. My goals are to eat healthier, exercise every day (just for these
two weeks as I am not <i>completely</i>
crazy), and drink a whole lot more water. (According to <i>PBS.org</i>, to discover
how much water you should drink in a day, divide your weight in half. For
example, 200 pound person should drink 100 ounces (“America’s Walking: Drinking
Water”). So I should be drinking…nevermind. I’m not that brave.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My life is stressful: I have three children ages four and
under. They don’t nap at coinciding intervals yet. I am new to this stay-at-home mom
business. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love food. I have trouble
finding time to work out. The next two weeks aren’t going to be easy, but I
have to kick-start something. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have a few tips and tricks I’ve learned and want to
implement to make a healthier life in general. I’ll share them with you. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Tell someone.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5vlsxYB9rksusfaLm71bbBSwENM-UKjArMfZmi-MRls_encSA_fbTaITdYufH0BRdzk2fWCQdEdJyManCUe7U6oelo9O7KGYIw0n7eWyoZCbeskxUMm0RHMsr4_ndS3wM0hboxEhwBQBy/s1600/away+they+go.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5vlsxYB9rksusfaLm71bbBSwENM-UKjArMfZmi-MRls_encSA_fbTaITdYufH0BRdzk2fWCQdEdJyManCUe7U6oelo9O7KGYIw0n7eWyoZCbeskxUMm0RHMsr4_ndS3wM0hboxEhwBQBy/s1600/away+they+go.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I kept making little promises with
myself to be good, but it’s pretty easy to break secret promises. I purposely didn’t
make concrete goals and vocalize them to anyone because I knew that meant
becoming serious about the sacrifice healthy living can mean. I texted a friend
about my challenge, asked her to join in any way she wished, wrote this blog
(terrifying), and started posting pictures to Instagram daily (even more
terrifying). Now people know, so I’ve got to keep going. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Set some goals.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As I said, I have made <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">specific</i> goals, and those goals have a
time-frame I can live within. I’m not giving up cookies forever. In fact, my
two-year-old asked for donuts today, and I told him there would be no donuts in
the house for two weeks…but we could have a donut party after that. When the
two weeks are up, I can make new goals that are easier to live up to on a
longer-term basis, such as working out 3-4 times a week and allowing myself a
couple “cheat” foods. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2FRQUAU2yzwRRY_14GPRquJE4j9Nlt9PNZI3MUyizepB_J4XEOnA3x387SeBd52XgL_V9_Y51MK77bZdWIHTQqMEMxm7-SDc9h2GsJ1WWAxpxJFoqzxy9NM-N8Qs7vs23xvkO0VtVgxzD/s1600/dipps.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2FRQUAU2yzwRRY_14GPRquJE4j9Nlt9PNZI3MUyizepB_J4XEOnA3x387SeBd52XgL_V9_Y51MK77bZdWIHTQqMEMxm7-SDc9h2GsJ1WWAxpxJFoqzxy9NM-N8Qs7vs23xvkO0VtVgxzD/s1600/dipps.jpg" height="149" width="200" /></span></a><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;"> 3)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Find ways to satisfy yourself. <o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My family believes in ending each
meal with something sweet. If I deny myself completely, I often find myself
covered in at least a dozen empty candy wrappers in a guilt-and-sugar-ridden
haze. I found these granola bars I’m letting myself eat every once in a while:
I compared their fat and calorie content to some Swiss Cake Rolls (which are in
my house today! Ah!), and I think the substitution is a much wiser way to help
my sweet-cravings.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZmmarRkx3ErEDx5VOvCbP9U_dyGYxdRzdawlPUtIlU-5PEdUuhZGmCiS0b1OQVQB6R75pOPltG5IFNmJWCUOhsOjrYOPZD0yQWZFO4WAM0oSsnYECnatE2sRi_7khMcYXrkTj18NsNeGE/s1600/t.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZmmarRkx3ErEDx5VOvCbP9U_dyGYxdRzdawlPUtIlU-5PEdUuhZGmCiS0b1OQVQB6R75pOPltG5IFNmJWCUOhsOjrYOPZD0yQWZFO4WAM0oSsnYECnatE2sRi_7khMcYXrkTj18NsNeGE/s1600/t.jpg" height="200" width="182" /></span></a><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Discover workouts you like.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I prefer weightlifting to cardio,
but I know I need the </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">latter </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">to burn off what three babies have helped me </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">add
on. (Actually, I always got nearly right back to pre-pregnancy weight before
getting pregnant again, so </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I cannot really blame past babies for current excess
pounds.) I’ve found some videos like Shaun T’s </span><i style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">T25</i><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and Jillian Michael’s </span><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i>30 </i></span><i style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Day
Shred</i><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> that combine strength training with bursts of cardio. This busy mama
loves the </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">20-25 minute lengths </span><span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and the combo of what I like and </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">what I need.</span></div>
<br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">5)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Learn it is okay to get dirty. <o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I don’t like waiting until later in
the day to get cleaned up, but while I am trying to meet some particular targets,
it is okay to change up that fresh-in-the-morning routine and shower after I
squeeze in a workout before lunch. (It’s really okay; it’s really okay—I keep
telling myself this.)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">6)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Cut yourself some slack.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In two weeks, I will have to learn
how to put regular workouts into my normal routine, but for right now, ignoring
the dishes (because household chores are a great excuse for skipping a workout)
is okay. I’ve talked to my husband about it, and he knows this is temporary. Give
yourself permission to drop a responsibility (besides the children) for a short
period of time. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">7)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Bribe yourself.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I asked my husband for a specific
amount of money as an award for losing ten pounds. These two weeks are to give
me a boost towards that goal. And, remember my donut party? With that money and
those pastries in mind, I can work out and eat well for fourteen days and make
later goals to continue on. I can! I can!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">8)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Get support.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I cannot eat well if my family is
chowing on pizza and ice cream all week, so—sorry guys—but those things are
banned. I’m going to cook meals we can all eat together. I may modify my
portions and double up on veggies while I go light on the carbs I offer them,
but my family is going to play a part in my success (whether they like
it or not…though they probably won’t even notice). <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">9)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><!--[endif]--><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Find some good visuals.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My friend was Mrs. Tennessee USA.
When her husband signed her up for the pageant (which she really did find a
splendid present, though I would have freaked!), she wasn’t in shape or ready
to show her body in front of a crowd. The pageant itself—and that stage—became
a reason to be healthier; there was no going back. She later advised me, as I
was working off the weight of my second child, to find some visuals to leave
out, such as a bathing suit or a dress you want to get back into. Or, better
yet, a new dress! Such visuals make your goals more tangible and meaningful. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Cambria; mso-fareast-font-family: Cambria;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">10)<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">Remember
why you are doing this.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Finally, think carefully on your
motivation. I need to lose weight—not because I am ugly. I need to lose weight
because I have a closet full of incredible clothes I miss dearly. And, my body
is a temple (1 Corinthians 6:19). I will NOT desecrate that temple by speaking
poorly of it, especially in front of my children. But I need to take action.
The next two weeks will stink (literally, as I will be sweating it up each
day), but, after that, 3-4 workouts a week will seem much more practical, and a
couple cheat meals will feel incredibly rewarding.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">PS—On DAY ONE of the new workout routine, my potty-trainer
decided to make two accidents for me to clean up right after I got the baby in
her crib. Then he wanted to climb under my planks. Then the baby woke up when
the video had eight minutes left. BUT, I had to tell myself that even an
unfinished workout is better than a bum on the couch.</span></div>
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<span style="color: black;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">PPS—On DAY TWO, I tried to jam three children in
a double stroller. The baby told me in no uncertain terms she preferred to be
carried. Though I've been advised that a walk isn't the best workout, but there must be
some exception when said walk involves toting an extra 11 pounds in a baby
sling while pushing an extra 70-80 pounds of little boys and stroller. Plus,
as it started to rain on our way back, I sweated much harder than any workout
video as I huffed to get the baby to shelter. <i>Exercise = accomplished</i>. Every
day is a new lesson; I’m working it out. </span><span style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">“America’s Walking: Drinking Water.” <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">PBS.org. </i>n.d. Web. 10 June 2014. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">First Corinthians 6:19. </span><i style="font-size: x-small;">Biblegateway.com.
</i><span style="font-size: xx-small;">n.d. Web. 9 June 2014.</span></div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-16099402191318295132014-06-04T11:28:00.002-05:002014-06-04T11:41:59.613-05:00Summer Mama Style<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT0xMGtSUG7Fjv2pTYwY7LyZj49crXSH50kzc0x0tNl9dkIFUL8BF2OelAhHHEKQUSlLaUM7ssCjLzCkcdQYA8qY5ygBNRCC-ify7twsemANS7nw1sF8fAeG2aTiLj8Hbo5sLPfSwD-xvR/s1600/panash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT0xMGtSUG7Fjv2pTYwY7LyZj49crXSH50kzc0x0tNl9dkIFUL8BF2OelAhHHEKQUSlLaUM7ssCjLzCkcdQYA8qY5ygBNRCC-ify7twsemANS7nw1sF8fAeG2aTiLj8Hbo5sLPfSwD-xvR/s1600/panash.jpg" height="151" width="320" /></a></div>
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I always feel honored to guest blog for paNASH Style. <a href="http://panashstyle.blogspot.com/2014/06/summer-mama-style.html">Click here </a>to read my article with tips about how a stay-at-home mama can still have style. </div>
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herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-50239512361241239812014-06-02T14:15:00.000-05:002014-06-02T14:15:23.476-05:00You are exactly where you are supposed to be.<div class="MsoNormal">
For Mother’s Day, my children gave me a bag of Dove
chocolates. If you aren’t familiar with this treat, the foil wrapping for each
piece of delight carries an uplifting message. The first one I opened this May
2014 told me, “You are exactly where you are supposed to be.” Creepy candy
knowing me too well.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj4iYde9x-LnTEFTAfoGdM59b2cH0EduaShj5nPDlj-LTBJh8kREvbB4PB30fgdvmOrl9ulYwfx_fonSruKAI-__LS5Q0sVEA130T7RdChx0SJ_4MOVc3Z8iGQvDCSH9vSouSaVgbdVkQG/s1600/IMG_1509.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj4iYde9x-LnTEFTAfoGdM59b2cH0EduaShj5nPDlj-LTBJh8kREvbB4PB30fgdvmOrl9ulYwfx_fonSruKAI-__LS5Q0sVEA130T7RdChx0SJ_4MOVc3Z8iGQvDCSH9vSouSaVgbdVkQG/s1600/IMG_1509.jpg" height="314" width="320" /></a></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
I see I haven’t blogged since February of 2013. My life is
completely different now than it was then. Though I had an excruciating
journey, I <b><i>am </i></b>exactly where I’m supposed to be. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Hymnist William Mackay
penned, “Revive us again; fill each heart with thy love. May each soul be
rekindled with fire from above: Hallelujah—thine the glory. Hallelujah—Amen!” That <i>fire</i> refers
to a blazing desire, an overwhelming thankfulness, an all-encompassing passion
for the Savior. But fire burns. And sometimes it is an agonizing flame that
brings us to exactly where we are supposed to be.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Healing takes time. Many months passed before I uttered, “While I
wish I had gotten here some other way, I’m glad for where I am.” More months
passed before I realized: there was no other way. Fire cannot deliver without
destroying. Sanctity cannot exist without scabs and scorches. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I don’t believe God burned me into beauty. I do believe He embraced
me in the blaze. And I believe He made exquisiteness the outcome of the evil
that surrounded me. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Once again I am <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">here</i></b>, feeling now more than ever the
consequence of the name of this blog. And I feel ready to move, knowing these
scars aren’t something I have to overcome; they are a reminder of the love that
overcame me. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Hallelujah—Amen!” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">Mackay, William P. “We Praise Thee, O God.” 1863. <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Praise for the Lord. </i>Ed. John P.
Wiegand. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nashville, TN: Praise Press, 1997.
732. Print.</span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> <o:p></o:p></i></div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-86054040878102789332013-02-13T15:20:00.000-06:002013-02-13T15:28:05.385-06:00Lent: Day 1Yesterday was the Fattest of Tuesdays. Today is Lent: Day 1.<br />
<br />
To answer your initial questions--<br />
<br />
1) No, I am not Catholic.<br />
2) I have observed Lent about five times in my life and will continue from this point on<br />
2b) because I find it good for the soul to take something out of my life that I tend to rely on or become spoiled by.<br />
3) I am giving up dresses (buying, not wearing) and Target.<br />
4) Last year I gave up Target and saved hundreds of dollars.<br />
5) No, I cannot keep that hundreds of dollars and buy 46 Target dresses when Lent is over.<br />
5b) The money saved will go to paying off some debt and saving for the future.<br />
<br />
You need know to a couple of things about me. I. Love. Target. I. Love. Dresses. Subsequently, I love buying dresses at Target and on <i>Target.com</i>. I may or may not have talked to complete strangers in the return lane at the store about how they should get a Target debit card so they, too, can get free shipping and returns on all items...including but not limited to <i>dresses. </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
In my defense, I wear dresses to work. I work at a design school that has a Fashion Design Department. Also, I love Ross and House of Stella (in the Cool Springs area in Middle Tennessee); I spread around my dress-buying love. But have you ever scrolled through the clearance dresses on <i>Target.com</i>? Have you checked out the latest guest designer, Prabal Gurung?<br />
<br />
Okay--I fully admit I have a problem. I also fully admit that<br />
I. am. spoiled.<br />
No, blessed. Let's use "blessed."<br />
<br />
And that's part of this challenge because sometimes I forget this truth. And my seemingly-silly self-denial won't be easy. I mean, Prabal Gurung's dress line just came out this week. I won't get to grab one in clearance in the coming weeks (if they even last that long). And I'm going to miss my Target dates with my mom. And the thrill of the <i>big reveal </i>of wearing a new dress for the first time: I'm going to miss that as well. But though these things bring me happiness, they aren't my sole source. Here's to 46 days of Publix, Kroger, and the same (beautiful...and lots of them, really) dresses.<br />
<br />
I. am. blessed.<br />
<br />
Here's to 46 days of that.<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgctdskn3UE594RG5Iy-d28SpM4vPLSC22WzIHh5_BQPKSWEcYoQh6_z9qnm4ZnF0o9_bo1W7EdEzUjW3dPFEedQzfEtotSQbIxliUqpW_WA3so8kDtxscOn9RG4tTH0-1nE0jl0KNjdTBs/s1600/dress1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgctdskn3UE594RG5Iy-d28SpM4vPLSC22WzIHh5_BQPKSWEcYoQh6_z9qnm4ZnF0o9_bo1W7EdEzUjW3dPFEedQzfEtotSQbIxliUqpW_WA3so8kDtxscOn9RG4tTH0-1nE0jl0KNjdTBs/s320/dress1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Prabal Gurung design--so you know what I'm missing out on </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIz15hfBHfixk95sPVdvEVlEw-6TGOcVYtx_qnFGOLmPVQ_p8N7-ui-aUQKWGyAqFipRtu7iDOtGNYfpkUdf6PHZ2APlszHq58jEdNFCI16QKtMRIvtojnORk7ee4bC5vqnKAoqinEqTWG/s1600/dress3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIz15hfBHfixk95sPVdvEVlEw-6TGOcVYtx_qnFGOLmPVQ_p8N7-ui-aUQKWGyAqFipRtu7iDOtGNYfpkUdf6PHZ2APlszHq58jEdNFCI16QKtMRIvtojnORk7ee4bC5vqnKAoqinEqTWG/s320/dress3.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
got this number at Ross last week--just in the nick of time</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcjaHajkKws15z3r27Kn8ccT9E5eGfPK_jq4H3rjgfSNWmUt2wLzNGXPOLBiNaWkIgubDGcERKhqIfMrcYxCOBjb56ziBilR7QJoXEr1MlOTeiCJOXEqLL4SbdEFPK_4qDI40GcdO2PHcf/s1600/dress2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcjaHajkKws15z3r27Kn8ccT9E5eGfPK_jq4H3rjgfSNWmUt2wLzNGXPOLBiNaWkIgubDGcERKhqIfMrcYxCOBjb56ziBilR7QJoXEr1MlOTeiCJOXEqLL4SbdEFPK_4qDI40GcdO2PHcf/s320/dress2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
a design by Kaitlyn Phillips, O'More College of Design graduate,</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
and my grandmother, who had beautiful dresses</div>
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIQx9fY8NKKQ7xgO7in9X58r-R8JRxmbwxT2rdDctRpTc6tS4F7Qp02gybSVgb6ViOnpj-y5QRAUHZmHSvY0myyI40tI734NzXJjEL6qmiptYHumC-TzDvI6oT8SCXuZL1iVkP3GjFJ0XK/s1600/dress4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIQx9fY8NKKQ7xgO7in9X58r-R8JRxmbwxT2rdDctRpTc6tS4F7Qp02gybSVgb6ViOnpj-y5QRAUHZmHSvY0myyI40tI734NzXJjEL6qmiptYHumC-TzDvI6oT8SCXuZL1iVkP3GjFJ0XK/s320/dress4.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Target clearance</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXhZom52eb6EwcF32Far_iJhO_MOcgs7-BpW5lyseMFYoNyOSSlrp6hPoGOY7YK9DCfd1cBT6e6f2TPRCmtDOUgHR0SKCt12Z2Ds6AZ6qCYL44H-RvEt8W50_Vc-QTYLJpJuwNtgzPbAgl/s1600/dress5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXhZom52eb6EwcF32Far_iJhO_MOcgs7-BpW5lyseMFYoNyOSSlrp6hPoGOY7YK9DCfd1cBT6e6f2TPRCmtDOUgHR0SKCt12Z2Ds6AZ6qCYL44H-RvEt8W50_Vc-QTYLJpJuwNtgzPbAgl/s320/dress5.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I even wear dresses with jeans.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheC0JHg47-aJjgGddvrGs6kgtmtjJZY4llMfz-NlrNM8i5xAQtfdQVWqvm_j-LVgVAiJUbpge3QG915hPBVBiENMz8t7a-Y03mrL8C1YRoyNZynrux2BG1WtjJtc81CBdItsT9146_onMb/s1600/dress6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheC0JHg47-aJjgGddvrGs6kgtmtjJZY4llMfz-NlrNM8i5xAQtfdQVWqvm_j-LVgVAiJUbpge3QG915hPBVBiENMz8t7a-Y03mrL8C1YRoyNZynrux2BG1WtjJtc81CBdItsT9146_onMb/s320/dress6.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
another Target clearance dress</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-13305926714692331042013-01-25T17:04:00.004-06:002013-01-25T17:04:55.206-06:00Just Try It OnI am always honored to guest blog for the lovely and talented image consultant, media coach, author, and public speaker Lori Bumgarner. Find my post on fashion <a href="http://panashstyle.blogspot.com/2013/01/guest-blog-just-try-it-on.html">here</a>.<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6tpl8e0vJLoyBDuD7NpyYYsHcdL-lS17hybx-vCTK02hWnwIjgWU31Zlm54uUVv_4hzba31M2s4I66iWMvDHzHgJDQEoylPzGKK5Niv86jd1LgKQ_dyMx3oqcrwTInLTdRzyTCAhX4uKf/s1600/lori.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6tpl8e0vJLoyBDuD7NpyYYsHcdL-lS17hybx-vCTK02hWnwIjgWU31Zlm54uUVv_4hzba31M2s4I66iWMvDHzHgJDQEoylPzGKK5Niv86jd1LgKQ_dyMx3oqcrwTInLTdRzyTCAhX4uKf/s320/lori.jpg" width="228" /></a></div>
<br />herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-70303185395827970752013-01-19T17:20:00.002-06:002014-06-04T14:30:52.244-05:00a pictorial post: 26 ways to find joy in the journey <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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1) Count your blessings. </div>
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2) Dance</div>
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3) Play with someone you love. </div>
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4) Share a meal.</div>
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5) Go on a walk.</div>
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6) Stare at something beautiful. </div>
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7) Get into nature.</div>
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8) SMILE!</div>
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9) Go shopping with friends. (Also, laugh at grammer mistakes.)</div>
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10) Put on your most comfortable clothes.</div>
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11) Make funny faces.</div>
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12) LAUGH! (Pandora set to your favorite comedian is a great stress-relief.)</div>
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13) Dress up.</div>
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14) Play with your food. (And hope it doesn't play back. Yuck.)</div>
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15) Get some Vitamin D.</div>
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16) RUN.</div>
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17) Hug. Snuggle. Yum.</div>
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18) Find a good read.</div>
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19) Vent to someone who will listen and love.</div>
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20) Have a cup of tea.</div>
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21) Put on your boots, and go splosh in some muddy puddles. </div>
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22) Take a nice bath. </div>
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23) Get dressed up.</div>
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24) Make a new friend.</div>
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25) Build a fort.</div>
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26) Go on an adventure.</div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-31489931607928031742013-01-19T16:52:00.001-06:002013-01-21T13:44:39.869-06:00Secrets to a Happier Life<br />
Happiness comes easily for some. For others, we struggle to find joy. I don't mean we never smile or laugh--I just mean we usually find it easier to fret, find fault, furrow our brows.<br />
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At times in my life, happiness has come only when I made a concerted effort to find it. And I never found it in <i>more; </i>I only found it when I made a simple decision: <i>be happy.</i><br />
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Of course, what starts as a simple decision has to be backed up by action. Changes were made, friends were relied upon, some habits were broken, other habits were taken up: sometimes it takes a lot of work, but the busier I am reaching goals, being with friends, and reconstructing areas of my life toward the positive--the less time I have to think about sadness, or lost opportunities, or failures, or frustrations with others.<br />
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Amanda Sekulow, founder of <a href="http://www.glamministries.org/">GLAM Ministries</a>, encourages me all the time to tackle the areas of my life I need to and can change, and to accept what I cannot. Whenever I need a dose of inspiration to take on a task, I often text Amanda and ask for a lunch date. Hearing someone else say "you can do it" with the added reality of "though it might be difficult" is the perfect prescription. <br />
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"Dover Beach" by Matthew Arnold is one of the best poems for me to read when I am feeling particularly morose. My saying that, and you reading it, may bring a surprise:<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">...the world, which seems</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">To lie before us like a land of dreams,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">So various, so beautiful, so new,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">Hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">Nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain;</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">And we are here as on a darkling plain</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">Swept with confused alarms of struggle and flight,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, Verdana, 'Helvetica sans-serif'; font-size: 12px; text-align: justify;">Where ignorant armies clash by night. (ll. 30-37)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica sans-serif;"><i>Jessa, how on earth does something so depressing help you find happiness? </i>Because. I don't want to be like that. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica sans-serif;">I don't want to focus my life on thoughts that the world "hath really neither joy, nor love, nor light, nor certitude, nor peace, nor help for pain" (ll. 33-34). My one life here on this planet is my chance to touch others, to be a light. What a horrible way to live, caught up in my own dismay. What a waste of precious time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica sans-serif;">Most of the time, the only thing standing in the way of my happiness is my attitude.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica sans-serif;">I'm not saying we cannot have a bad day or one of those cry-your-eyes-out afternoons, but <i>overall</i>, we would be a lot wiser to focus on our blesses and spend less time on our own personal "darkling plain," struggling and clashing instead of loving others--and loving ourselves. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica sans-serif;">For a pictorial list of ideas on how to focus on happiness, <a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2013/01/a-pictorial-post-26-happiness-helps.html">go here. </a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Arnold, Matthew. "Dover Beach." <i>100 Best-Loved Poems. </i>Ed. Philip Smith. Mineola, NY: Dover, 1995. Print.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Verdana, Helvetica sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">this post is linked up with</span></div>
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<a href="http://www.carissagraham.com/search/label/miscellany%20monday"><img align="center" alt="miscellany monday at lowercase letters" hspace="none" src=" http://i617.photobucket.com/albums/tt255/ElvishAuthoress/MMbutton3.png " vspace="none" /></a> <a href="http://thebettermom.com/" target="_blank"><img alt="TheBetterMom.com" class="aligncenter" height="125" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWF890Pt3eqkoNmBeqvaEykI29h66ZzZHiNCgH9BzcDvmirIGsXcRg7-ia6Cn3ahT5MrFGqxWqRQwCgCtsyiqx5kaQ3VtLqQUt577AGnp1Lq0R7y2PETUP521E6dJwjDR5_8D3wcdVnYs/s1600/BetterMondaysLinkup.jpg" width="125" /></a> <img alt="The Alabaster Jar" src="http://i1125.photobucket.com/albums/l599/joleneengle/maritalonenessmondaysjarpinkbuttoncopy.png" style="border: none;" /></div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-63276167204761457292013-01-13T16:38:00.000-06:002013-01-14T09:11:26.618-06:00a mentor's lessons, never forgottenOne May morning in 2001, I delivered the Salutatorian speech at my high school graduation. It was in honor of my middle through high school band director, Mr. Daryl Jack. I've known him eighteen years now, and beginning of 2013 brought the end of his life.<br />
<br />
When I was contacted by another former field commander (I directed the marching band in 2000.) and requested to salute his casket at the end of his funeral, I did something out of the ordinary for me. Far, far out of the ordinary. But I felt a specific calling--to speak at his funeral. So I was bold and asked the funeral director for permission to do so.<br />
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And he said yes.<br />
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On January 5, 2013, I sat behind the stage as the funeral began, biting my lip and ignoring reality as I hoped my ability to fight back tears would sustain me once again. But I was feeling vulnerable. I had almost lost it in the parking lot simply <i>looking </i>at the band room doors. So I prayed.<br />
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<i>God. I need to do this. I need to have the strength and peace to deliver these words to honor this man. Please help me not to cry. When I am done, I can sob my face off, but just let me finish.</i><br />
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I kid you not--I immediately felt peace.<br />
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But then my throat got an itch.<br />
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<i>Okay, God--me again. One more thing. Now please clear this nervous itch so that the words are strong and clear. That's really it this time. Thank you.</i><br />
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And He granted that request as well.<br />
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The minute I walked off stage, seeing my mom and older brother sitting with the current band, I began the waves of sobbing, which roared up again when the band (present members as well as graduates from many years before) began to play "Amazing Grace," the same variation with the same saxophone solo I had played nearly thirteen years before.<br />
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What do you say when you want to honor someone who touched your life for eighteen years? Who brought passion and wisdom to music, one of your greatest life loves? How can you come up with words that will do justice? You cannot. You don't. You quote his.<br />
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And I did.<br />
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Below is what I shared last week at the funeral of one of my greatest mentors. I apologize for the lengthy post, but I think reading the life lessons he instilled in me--and hundreds of other band students--will be worth your time. On a final introduction note, I gave Mr. Jack a typed and framed version of the main points from my speech in 2001. Today, I learned that my gift was still in his band office, found by his best friend as he gathered Mr. Jack's belongings to return to his children. I hope Mr. Jack knew that I still live his influence even twelve years after having him as my official teacher.<br />
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<!--StartFragment-->
<br />
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When I first
heard Mr. Jack was seriously ill, I had mixed emotions. I couldn’t concentrate
on the sadness for a while, with Christmas break coming to an end and a house
full of sick babies. Life can have a way of getting in the way.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="text-indent: 4.5pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="text-indent: 4.5pt;">But I did begin remembering. I had
band with Mr. Jack from 6</span><sup style="text-indent: 4.5pt;">th</sup><span style="text-indent: 4.5pt;">-12</span><sup style="text-indent: 4.5pt;">th</sup><span style="text-indent: 4.5pt;"> grade. That is 7 years
with the same teacher: in class, through practice, on band trips. You cannot be
that involved in someone’s life without hearts becoming attached—</span><b style="text-indent: 4.5pt;">especially when one of those hearts was Mr.
Jack’s.</b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
When I
graduated in 2001, I gave a speech—in this same room…to some of you—called “All
I need to know in life I learned in band.” I found that speech, along with a
lot of photos from an imfamous band trip to San Antonio that included seven hours in
the airport because of a flight delay. I’d like to share an updated portion of
that speech, with some of the lessons I shared that May nearly twelve years ago,
and one new one that came to me this week. These are either direct quotes or
incredibly close paraphrases from Mr. Jack himself. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->1)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span><!--[endif]-->Whether you think you can, or think
you can’t—you’re right.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]-->In high school, I had this as a Post
It on my mirror—with the words <b>“think
you can’t”</b> crossed out. This morning I put it up on my fridge. Some of you
may have seen the Instagram or Facebook post. Our confidence levels affect our
performance levels. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><b>Mr. Jack gave me confidence. <o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->2)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">
</span><!--[endif]-->Practice doesn’t
make perfect; <b>perfect practice </b>makes
perfect.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]-->I know you’ve heard the saying, “practice makes
perfect,” but it’s just not true. If you only give something <b>partial attention</b> when you are
rehearsing, you aren’t going to perform at 100%. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]-->Mentors<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;"> give us shape, smooth out our roughed up
edges, encourage greatness. Mr. Jack—who is still my mentor—taught me how to
achieve <b>greatness through diligent
practice.</b> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->3)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">
</span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">Don’t give up just because you fail.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">I used to audition for Middle
Tennessee Clinic band, and I never made it. I usually only tried out every other year,
because it took that long to get over the defeat—but Mr. Jack kept telling me
to go back and try again. Just because you’ve been given <b>no reason</b> to believe you can do something, doesn’t mean you
shouldn’t take that chance. Mr. Jack believed in me, <b>even when I failed.</b> That faith made me believe in myself.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->4)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">
</span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">Remember to breathe.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">When I would get nervous before
a solo or audition, Mr. Jack told me to use more air. So simple, right? <b>Breathe.</b> Life can become chaos—Mr. Jack
showed me the importance of remaining calm while giving something my all.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->5)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">
</span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">Early’s on time, on time is late, and late is unacceptable.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">I know most of you remember
this one. What an important quote! Mr. Jack gave me practical life lessons on
punctuality that I still hear in my head every time I’m running late. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]-->6)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">
</span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">And, finally, family is more than your siblings and parents.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"> </span></span><!--[endif]--><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">I can remember the band being
singled out over the school intercom by a former principal for moving chairs in
the cafeteria. Mr. Jack jokingly told us to stop being so inclusive and kind to
one another. When our tables were full, we didn’t turn away a fellow band
member. <b>We pulled up a chair.</b></span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">We’re a
band. We’ve laughed together, sweated together, worn the same band jackets and
hats as the generations before us, traveled together, had meals together—<b>and today, we grieve together.</b> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">Because we are a family who has
lost our father. <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">It’s not
wrong to cry today, and it’s not wrong to be glad to see each other—we are
coming together again, though, in a way, we never <b>fully</b> left each other. We have been forever united by our mutual
love of 8 to 5, heal to toe (which still helps me walk carefully when carrying
a full beverage), common time, “Rocky Top,” and, <b>most importantly, of Mr. Jack,</b> who loved us as well and will
forever be the man who gave us confidence, taught us about greatness, believed
in us, told us to breathe, made us punctual, and <b>was a teacher, friend, and band father we will never forget. </b></span><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Lucida Grande"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><b><br /></b></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigeoZPuCXunIxHl0C2BTZZjF4KvnBLY0hMtGfeSFopz2NP2njqAJXEKRJxiKMN0K3gleW3qG3E72iOQz0cLUsNbK37KdmlRw-ILso0zWoswe0Mud_vbzSEzQPTjAu0SCG30ppVyIqgHCct/s1600/mrjack.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigeoZPuCXunIxHl0C2BTZZjF4KvnBLY0hMtGfeSFopz2NP2njqAJXEKRJxiKMN0K3gleW3qG3E72iOQz0cLUsNbK37KdmlRw-ILso0zWoswe0Mud_vbzSEzQPTjAu0SCG30ppVyIqgHCct/s320/mrjack.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
I had to stand on the director's podium to reach him. Here is Mr. Jack giving me my senior gift (Duck Tape--which held together my first vehicle and my first saxophone case) and the Patrick S. Gilmore award.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<div style="text-align: center;">
following his direction as I play my senior solo</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDj1-xcWVu8M1wQCvAhH6lAT83c0FOAC-iWHURilLSveGqEtg73aBKKdj3aVl0BqBWFaBjLvm-WRDKJrC5RXhSjkoXqZKbqFpkKm1R2RyOX0en3azHmBZYhzuZmypYYWbvU7nrgyNHSAm3/s1600/mrjack2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDj1-xcWVu8M1wQCvAhH6lAT83c0FOAC-iWHURilLSveGqEtg73aBKKdj3aVl0BqBWFaBjLvm-WRDKJrC5RXhSjkoXqZKbqFpkKm1R2RyOX0en3azHmBZYhzuZmypYYWbvU7nrgyNHSAm3/s320/mrjack2.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #333333;">incredibly surprised and completely honored by the Patrick S. Gilmore award</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #333333;">Spring 2001</span><br />
<span style="color: #333333;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #333333; font-size: xx-small;">this post is linked up with</span><br />
<span style="color: #333333; font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
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<a href="http://thebettermom.com/" target="_blank"><img alt="TheBetterMom.com" class="aligncenter" height="125" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWF890Pt3eqkoNmBeqvaEykI29h66ZzZHiNCgH9BzcDvmirIGsXcRg7-ia6Cn3ahT5MrFGqxWqRQwCgCtsyiqx5kaQ3VtLqQUt577AGnp1Lq0R7y2PETUP521E6dJwjDR5_8D3wcdVnYs/s1600/BetterMondaysLinkup.jpg" width="125" /></a>
<a href="http://www.carissagraham.com/search/label/miscellany%20monday"><img align="center" alt="miscellany monday at lowercase letters" hspace="none" src=" http://i617.photobucket.com/albums/tt255/ElvishAuthoress/MMbutton3.png " vspace="none" /></a><span style="color: #0000ee;">http://www.raisingarrows.net/</span> </div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-63012577521451537602012-12-28T14:24:00.001-06:002012-12-28T14:24:28.001-06:00(k)No(w) More of Me
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">I need to somehow figure
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rest. The latter will never happen. This body was made for sleeping.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">So. Productivity is the
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">Here’s the problem: I like
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life aren’t going to walk away. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">So. Productivity is the
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">Here’s what all I
want/have to do: work, clean, cook, read, exercise (which gets dropped off the
list weekly), study the Bible, pray, write, watch television with my husband, play
with my kids, spend more time with my students, hang out with friends, have a little quiet time to
myself. That covers the majority of my weekly concerns, but doesn’t touch on
the random projects that pop up.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">I try </span><span style="font-family: Rockwell;">constantly </span><span style="font-family: Rockwell;">to give
myself an out whenever I do poorly in one category. Christmas, moving, busyness
in general: these are all great excuses for why things don’t get done to the
best of my ability. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">But—productivity is the
answer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">There won’t suddenly be more of me.
There won’t suddenly be more hours in the day. I have to use me and my hours to their maximum
potential. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">This means staying up a
little later, but not too late. This means checking out Pinterest for new
recipes and ideas, but not spending hours on it. This means going to bed with
enough energy left to read. This means making better to do lists. This means
working out my CrockPot more. This means saying <i>in a minute </i>and <i>I cannot right now </i>less often to my kids. This means doing a better job of asking my
husband to help. This means putting my priorities in line. Productivity is the
answer.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Rockwell;">So goodbye, 2012. You were
busy and blessed. Hello, 2013—you will be the same. But, I’m going to be ready
for you: ready, willing, and able to be the BEST self possible. Here’s to
purpose, priorities, and productivity. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<!--EndFragment-->herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-14742855246033874622012-11-14T14:48:00.000-06:002012-11-21T14:29:05.111-06:00You can never be "alone" "with" someone.<span style="font-family: inherit;">I like quotes. Quotes from writers, artists, comedians, and even my friends. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">In high school, one of my friends pointed out that you can never be "alone" "with" someone. Is that deep? Absurd? I'm not sure, but her quote stuck with me for more than thirteen years. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I've been thinking and writing today about being alone. My family isn't home today, and I've spent several hours alone. <i>On my own terms.</i> Such is a sweetness I rarely consume. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">So I slept late. Researched while I drank coffee. Watched <i>Property Brothers </i>while I ate plain pasta. Walked to work (on my day off) to see a student try on a Hemingway costume for a photo shoot this Friday. And sat (where I presently sit) in our library, trying to feed off of the creative ambiance as I wrote a chapter in a devotional book I'm working on and write this entry. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivLmyzDaYEyYtAG_HH9_Ow4MVWGqIrTaLRn6Jn-LfL42IHgXurLy44Wr6ZemnzXUGqQFKY40JZap6kfTqAM04coqIDMZycyR_9j19MyIerDAwEOwesbjhNaCXSG31Qyo3CCFk8mUtDxKw0/s1600/library.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivLmyzDaYEyYtAG_HH9_Ow4MVWGqIrTaLRn6Jn-LfL42IHgXurLy44Wr6ZemnzXUGqQFKY40JZap6kfTqAM04coqIDMZycyR_9j19MyIerDAwEOwesbjhNaCXSG31Qyo3CCFk8mUtDxKw0/s320/library.jpeg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Wouldn't you feel like writing if you sat where I sit?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Besides the quote from my high school pal, other things that come to mind when I think of the word "alone" are</span><br />
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<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">the ability to shower at an hour without the fear of waking a sleeping child,</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">the freedom to watch an episode of <i>The Nanny </i>in bed while flipping through Pinterest on my phone,</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">the chance to make plans with friends at any time without the mom-guilt of leaving family at home,</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">the blessing of eating pasta for 2/3rds of my daily meals,</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;">and, of course, the giant hair, exploding pianos, and half-face veils in <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Cw1ng75KP0">this music video.</a></span></li>
</ul>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Though I am sometimes (rarely...very very very rarely) alone, I am never lonely. <span style="font-size: 12pt;">God
has “made known to me the paths of life” by filling me with joy in His presence
(Psalm 16:11). Alone, but not abandoned, because I am always with Someone. </span></span><br />
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<a href="http://joyinthisjourney.com/category/memes/life-unmasked/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Life: Unmasked" border="0" src="http://joyinthisjourney.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/unmasked_New1501.jpg" /></a><a href="http://womenlivingwell.org/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img src="http://womenlivingwell.org/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/WLW-Button-150.png" /></a></div>
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herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-29488020348574402252012-11-04T07:45:00.001-06:002012-11-09T06:54:05.141-06:00Domestictitus: A Pinterest-Born IllnessI don't know what's happened to me. I have sudden urges to be all things domestic. Yes, I think I have a rare case of Domestictitus. And I'm pretty sure no one in my household wants me to recover.
It all started with a little sewing project.
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvpzMQIMz-Z7k_SE41Vq-LZkO-vnVMbLVMoP7S_Z6hSE0r1cgiB_bq-fN_qSn1kLmWVNa-ziFV6CcYjeDFRZIsUWfGqPEUQxC5wHDLJULuRmweLy07BuQCdsh1UqI-CXs90bh5NPNQG-Jr/s1600/IMG_4782.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvpzMQIMz-Z7k_SE41Vq-LZkO-vnVMbLVMoP7S_Z6hSE0r1cgiB_bq-fN_qSn1kLmWVNa-ziFV6CcYjeDFRZIsUWfGqPEUQxC5wHDLJULuRmweLy07BuQCdsh1UqI-CXs90bh5NPNQG-Jr/s320/IMG_4782.JPG" width="320" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh18HeTYUk3Fux1J8-r7U6h-2Ok9_yq3Q0pqmEwgfBtnxwPOmYt1dQdesLc2Lww4w9712P4qXjdvqJ4pX_xrtKRoi9AV-TUb3CHlms-MQdjhdHUIoOMZDxwWh1CqC9_Ae4d1u7C-F2rIcJR/s1600/IMG_4678.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh18HeTYUk3Fux1J8-r7U6h-2Ok9_yq3Q0pqmEwgfBtnxwPOmYt1dQdesLc2Lww4w9712P4qXjdvqJ4pX_xrtKRoi9AV-TUb3CHlms-MQdjhdHUIoOMZDxwWh1CqC9_Ae4d1u7C-F2rIcJR/s200/IMG_4678.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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Inspired by my friend's creations (look <a href="https://www.facebook.com/MonstersByAshley?fref=ts">here </a>at Ashley Balding's monsters), I decided to make 20 monsters as treats for the kids coming to my son's first birthday party. Ashley helped me with the sewing machine part, but I did the hand sewing of all the felt facial features. Why? </div>
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I don't know. </div>
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All I can think of to blame is this illness.</div>
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And it didn't stop there. </div>
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Suddenly, out of absolutely nowhere, I started cooking. Yes, c-o-o-k-i-n-g!</div>
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A friend and I started meal planning for budgetary and personal challenge reasons. Now our families get new meals several times each week. Above is an adapted recipe from Pinterest. I call it Parmesan Chicken Parmesan. (I adapt all recipes, which is why I have trouble baking...you really need to follow those recipes perfectly. I guess my rebel-streak comes out even in the kitchen.) I mixed parmesan cheese, season salt, garlic powder, milk, and melted butter in a bowl and spread it all over raw chicken in a baking dish. Then I put some small chunks of butter hither and thither on top and baked for about 35 minutes on 350*. My husband actually said these words, "This is yummy." An unsolicited "yummy" from a man who is usually satisfied with a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Anytime. Anywhere there is a spoon.</div>
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Success.</div>
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Now I am making Christmas presents for people and taking lessons to overcome my fear of the sewing machine. I freak out when my kitchen counter is dirty. I clean my toilets three times a week. I'm doing art projects with my three-year-old. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ1qCcLjzqHWlyyMNGDwaUR9evKWgbKIcp3A-f3mW13BUBM3oDSS8S0lpaZgHTFAdygyxA4GMUEBBZoFJLXfChyphenhyphengrXDs18fmQXnyq1z6hof-mijeB1Bk1caDY9LvCXjtUMal1WSF_TY-pI/s1600/IMG_5201.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ1qCcLjzqHWlyyMNGDwaUR9evKWgbKIcp3A-f3mW13BUBM3oDSS8S0lpaZgHTFAdygyxA4GMUEBBZoFJLXfChyphenhyphengrXDs18fmQXnyq1z6hof-mijeB1Bk1caDY9LvCXjtUMal1WSF_TY-pI/s200/IMG_5201.JPG" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5nWCWsjOa3qDPY5dLgoPZHAA6yFOLNfk3E-Kh6jL6GCwjnYe7RNyp7ZEUxmJaUBqUsC9AZ3stVpdhkUEQrFWIpMHGsSKow_e0HiHtIrAGBPVdcwkJGkuSxXdx5wVjSmNlRupqPQ2rYOkV/s1600/IMG_5204.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5nWCWsjOa3qDPY5dLgoPZHAA6yFOLNfk3E-Kh6jL6GCwjnYe7RNyp7ZEUxmJaUBqUsC9AZ3stVpdhkUEQrFWIpMHGsSKow_e0HiHtIrAGBPVdcwkJGkuSxXdx5wVjSmNlRupqPQ2rYOkV/s200/IMG_5204.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
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If a doctor asked me, upon reflection, the only thing I can think to blame my Domestictitus on is my newfound interest in Pinterest. It's the only new thing in my life that has exposed me to party planning, sewing projects, recipes, cleaning tips, and art projects (though I mostly blame the cleaning obsession with us having our house on the market for nine months, living in fear of the random showing). And, yes, I spend a little too much time scrolling through the endless amounts of new pins, but as soon as I can get that under better control, I'd have to say that I think the results of this illness/obsession are mostly positive. </div>
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How else would I have thought to create these Halloween treats? </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio58tQbNMcc0Sy_yeVXZZqJyab07i2-OEBaayhrpK0CD8QP0FoE8D1TDIADsCscWDZSNxyenadnKd7-5EZso_yWmLD-__jrpksz5kUAM3Rhby2HeYiZkJIbvkSq44vPABINRJMRs7F4T83/s1600/owls.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEio58tQbNMcc0Sy_yeVXZZqJyab07i2-OEBaayhrpK0CD8QP0FoE8D1TDIADsCscWDZSNxyenadnKd7-5EZso_yWmLD-__jrpksz5kUAM3Rhby2HeYiZkJIbvkSq44vPABINRJMRs7F4T83/s200/owls.jpeg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYV3_xqWg027mTq2MF1s8eEYcciAIHxmTyNfUPkQaMCrpcjmTOzdPMODlZvlmdixW2oPqT6N62Qf-s-ur-1ZxycL4Vn3driLp6tt9cKJhzwvf8Ao93peWDdnbD8O282OMGOnSdWp-JO-s3/s1600/ghosts.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYV3_xqWg027mTq2MF1s8eEYcciAIHxmTyNfUPkQaMCrpcjmTOzdPMODlZvlmdixW2oPqT6N62Qf-s-ur-1ZxycL4Vn3driLp6tt9cKJhzwvf8Ao93peWDdnbD8O282OMGOnSdWp-JO-s3/s200/ghosts.jpeg" style="cursor: move;" width="200" /></a></div>
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But I'm not just taking ideas from others: in general, I'm just in a domestically-creative phase. Pattern-free, I made my baby's Halloween costume.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6cj9gIWwZ6bpjviTSrv4hBwqq2lhfSW_8GENsOQuPzv2yjLtauYzj4gzCiJwHiKe3pS2y3I5u1HEYOlxfM29m1wPzWf4mEQ0mo4Df3JqdG-KZqGgLWB_csrbUIAf8ZjG8D1zz789a-LNw/s1600/IMG_5494.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6cj9gIWwZ6bpjviTSrv4hBwqq2lhfSW_8GENsOQuPzv2yjLtauYzj4gzCiJwHiKe3pS2y3I5u1HEYOlxfM29m1wPzWf4mEQ0mo4Df3JqdG-KZqGgLWB_csrbUIAf8ZjG8D1zz789a-LNw/s320/IMG_5494.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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And then there was this stroke of genius, which I have to co-credit to my husband. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMiMEj-H8EHWOhQDVzrqH2sAwBV36tZvZSiKOo0nIHr8MyXZtlsStBvclbtd9QxZEorBzpddaIFwoAJ63GgDt44dTXvcNVb45yJdqcrzwG_4Yye9-i9jS_p7cpTa5Vub4YmDWq2BWzSYDp/s1600/clark.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMiMEj-H8EHWOhQDVzrqH2sAwBV36tZvZSiKOo0nIHr8MyXZtlsStBvclbtd9QxZEorBzpddaIFwoAJ63GgDt44dTXvcNVb45yJdqcrzwG_4Yye9-i9jS_p7cpTa5Vub4YmDWq2BWzSYDp/s320/clark.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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So...however I caught it, I think I'll keep it. Our house is cleaner, our tastebuds happier, our budget more productive, our kids more paint-covered, and my trips to Hobby Lobby more frequent. (Thank you, 40% off one item coupons.) And I'm even enjoying it, so I hope these desires stay strong. When it comes to my new domestic desires, I want to push forward with my favorite line from Tennyson's "Ulyssess" in mind: "To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield!"<br />
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<a href="http://www.homesanctuary.com/rachelanne/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img src="http://i190.photobucket.com/albums/z209/rachelanneridge/Picture2.png " /></a><a href="http://rachelmariemartin.blogspot.com/search/label/friday%20favorite%20things" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="friday favorite things | finding joy" hspace="none" src="http://i617.photobucket.com/albums/tt255/ElvishAuthoress/fridayfavoritethings.png" vspace="none" /></a></div>
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herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-71312992898901370572012-10-30T07:32:00.000-05:002012-10-30T07:36:51.227-05:00Lean Not on Your Own part 1"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding." Proverbs 3:5<br />
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<i>But my understanding is strong. And secure. And logically valid.</i><br />
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This verse was the first in a seven day devotional series on decision making I started yesterday. Why yesterday in particular? Because we are <b>house hunting! </b><br />
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If you follow this blog, you may remember <a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/06/nice-but-houses-and-humilty.html">this post</a> about my learning humility from our condo being on the market for so many months. Well, we got a contract...hoping that all things go through for a closing in late November. Which means that, if everything does go through, we'll need a new home by that time. Which means that we are looking, in quite a short amount of time, for the house we want to suit our family for the next fifty-plus years. <i style="font-weight: bold;">That's a lot of pressure, </i>you say? I'm glad you agree with me!<br />
In times like this, it's easy to<br />
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<b>lean on my own understanding.</b><br />
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Why aren't there any suitable houses on the market in the target neighborhood I've thought, for more than a year now, that we are supposed to live in?<br />
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Am I supposed to open my mind to a different neighborhood?<br />
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Are we supposed to wait again?<br />
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<i>What is the lesson here?</i><br />
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I am a professor, you see, and I think that lessons lie in pretty much...well...everything. I don't think it's a bad way to live--looking for learning in life's ups and downs and straight-ways, but it can be a little exhausting. Asking questions. Waiting for answers, or...more likely in my case...<b>making up your own answers based on <i>your own understanding. </i></b><br />
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Lean not on that, Jessa. Lean on Me.<br />
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So I'm doing a lot of praying and listening to others and considering options outside of my own understanding.<br />
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I don't like it.<br />
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And that's another life lesson.<br />
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House hunting in style with a <i>scarf</i>=my favorite fashion accessory. YAY for fall!</div>
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<a href="http://www.time-warp-wife.blogspot.com/"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG08-3dOJUlxWpyv2Bly56srMOqJaDZuko4F_TCEtIk_jdYKQpuH6muK6d58cJQncxNo-5EIo_WND7a0YDuHhMD0ZxkpyGbYIjKfEbHYa-e7fz2l7gONL4RSUDlXaPCbiiXPy776phzyY/s1600/TuesdaysButton.jpg" /></a> <a border="0" href="http://www.aboverubies.net/search/label/Domestically%20Divine%20Link-Up" target="_blank"><img src="http://i669.photobucket.com/albums/vv54/jasminecucuta/Jasminesdomesticallydivinebuttongood.png" /></a> <a href="http://frominmatestoplaydates.com/" title="From Inmates to Playdates"> <img alt="From Inmates to Playdates" border="0" src="http://www.frominmatestoplaydates.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/inmates-button-125.jpg" style="cursor: move; text-align: center;" title="From Inmates to Playdates" /></a>herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-5428488779188235852012-09-21T13:52:00.002-05:002012-09-21T13:52:28.583-05:00Today<br />
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“Today is only one day in all the days that will ever be. But what will happen in all the other days that ever come can depend on what you do today."</h1>
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--Ernest Hemingway</div>
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Those who know me know I love Ernest Hemingway. From his intriguing life to his ingenuity in the craft of writing to his fondness of cats--Hemingway captivates me. In some ways, my research has brought me to believe that Hemingway had so many wives and so many lives (the war hero, the war corespondent the hunter, the fisherman, the bull fighting enthusiast, the traveler...) because they were the fuel for his writing. </div>
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"Write about what you know." That is the adage we pensmen hear: at the top of the list of author advice. </div>
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What do I know? </div>
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I know my faults. I see them glaring at me most days. I know my strengths, and I enjoy pushing myself towards being even better. </div>
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I know love. Family. Honor. Duty. Sacrifice. Elation. Sorrow. All of those things I know more acutely than I did before because of motherhood. </div>
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I know that this balancing act of mothering, wifing, professoring, Christianing, writing, hoping, editing, friending, cooking, and every other bit that is my life is <i>not easy. </i></div>
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And I know that <span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">“today is only one day in all the days that will ever be. But what will happen in all the other days that ever come can depend on what you do today."</span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">I don't share this quote as a threat. (<i>Why is she giving me so much pressure? I already stress about not meeting </i>everyone's <i>needs </i>every <i>day!) </i>I share it as a reminder: don't forget today. In the midst of the chaos, find the beauty.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">I am glad for the gift of today: another day to achieve goals, love others, reflect Glory, dream, eat, and sleep. And we don't have to accumulate spouses or excel at a multitude of hobbies to affect others with our gifts. Whatever stops you from finding fulfillment in today (worry? Corrie Ten Boom says, "Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength."), to to get past it because, as Dr. Seuss says, "Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!"</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #181818; font-family: georgia, serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">And your being <i>you </i><b style="font-style: italic;">today</b> is a beautiful thing.</span></span></div>
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Above: A friend's small business, <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/Mansion-Marsh/288795951182680">Mansion and Marsh</a>, gave me this adorable tee shirt. Below: What fun it is to pull out the leggings! And I got this dress from Ross, one of my favorite stores. </div>
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herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-50571454925941988732012-09-13T15:14:00.002-05:002012-09-21T13:57:31.797-05:00Praying for YouA student just walked out of my office. I could tell her heart was heavy, and I thought I did my best to lighten things: to make possibilities seem brighter. But still, as I saw her leave, her shoulders low, my heart was low too.<br />
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And then I had a strong memory of one of the two times I cried in a college class (as a student). I'm not one who cries often in front of others. Once a professor showed <i>Shadowlands</i>, a movie based on the life of C. S. Lewis, and I admit I wept, as quietly as one may in a small classroom. The other time I cried in class, the time that came back to me when my student walked out my door, was when one of my Bible professors started class with a prayer. He was rattling off names. It took me a couple moments to realize what he was doing.<br />
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He was praying for each of us. By name.<br />
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Somehow hearing these names, hearing my name, felt powerful to me. And I cried.<br />
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Afterwards, he told us he did this every morning. All semester, I had this man (someone I really didn't know in the larger lecture class setting) praying for me <i>every day.</i><br />
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The henna I have on my feet right now, in an effort to memorize the verse, is Philippians 4:6.<br />
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<i>Don't be worried. Instead, in prayer and petition and with thanksgiving, bring everything to God in prayer. </i><br />
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Worrying is in the nature of most people: we stress, we fret, we break down. But God says that, instead of being anxious, we should bring our requests (in <i>thankfulness</i>) to Him. This verse had made me start rephrasing my prayers. Whatever it is that is bothering me generally has its roots in one of God's blessings.<br />
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I want our condo to sell: I am so blessed we have a place to live that is warm and welcoming.<br />
I worry I'm not doing a good enough job of multi-tasking: God has blessed me with a family and job and friends and talents and more.<br />
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Before I ask God to fix something, I try to think of the blessing in the brokenness.<br />
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And when my student walked out my door, I knew I couldn't <i>fix</i> what was hurting her. But I could pray for her. And for all of my students, being thankful that they are in my life, that I have a chance to be in theirs, and asking for peace, strength, and His presence revealed.<br />
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<a href="http://www.deniseinbloom.com/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt="Life In Bloom" border="0" height="163" src="http://www.deniseinbloom.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/LIB150button.jpg" width="150" /></a><a href="http://www.homesanctuary.com/rachelanne/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img src="http://i190.photobucket.com/albums/z209/rachelanneridge/Picture2.png " /></a><a href="http://www.beholdingglory.com/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank" title="Beholding Glory"><img alt="Beholding Glory" src="http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o304/laurakrokos/BGbutton.jpg" style="border: none;" /></a></div>
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herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-60462272035406168682012-08-24T15:11:00.000-05:002012-09-08T15:36:03.627-05:00Psalm 91<br />
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-family: "Lucida Grande"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I was reading Psalm 91 and was
thinking, "God, here it seems you are saying bad won't befall me if I
trust in you, but bad things happen to faithful Christians all the time." (I
am glad we serve a God who will listen to such words from my questioning spirit
without immediately striking me with lightning.) <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9Nf9RB0yvrARg4KBoFoPoDMR7L4ZXpD88NlxwU1_8aCwL2hIqGABMQ0kQXj66Jc8X1wg0UayfxURo8PXyB9Z6FuEHGYnIbcjI64wCDJKNqd8R6T6_7vo_5eJLOQfUzb6QyjDi-afZouX3/s1600/psalm+91.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9Nf9RB0yvrARg4KBoFoPoDMR7L4ZXpD88NlxwU1_8aCwL2hIqGABMQ0kQXj66Jc8X1wg0UayfxURo8PXyB9Z6FuEHGYnIbcjI64wCDJKNqd8R6T6_7vo_5eJLOQfUzb6QyjDi-afZouX3/s320/psalm+91.jpeg" width="213" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr2_xXKZt-9uXvSWk6GTarKD9W7L_U9Z0YWdZKsWdJzOIM_pb8N1C9R2-hXevsApaF_eGzlXDxppQ6ZwB7UvW-ymFv9fHMlwVlQApVIAc7QLrwrxDzZ7GChYCPHK6qnqEW6vbbo1yw8MDG/s1600/psalm+56.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr2_xXKZt-9uXvSWk6GTarKD9W7L_U9Z0YWdZKsWdJzOIM_pb8N1C9R2-hXevsApaF_eGzlXDxppQ6ZwB7UvW-ymFv9fHMlwVlQApVIAc7QLrwrxDzZ7GChYCPHK6qnqEW6vbbo1yw8MDG/s320/psalm+56.jpeg" width="213" /></a></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lucida Grande;">I still cannot understand the
seeming-conflict with that truth of pain and this scripture—and it is the crux
of where my fears hit (What if I have one of those "bad things to good people"
disasters?)—yet I think the main key is at the end of the verse above: God will
be </span><i style="color: #333333; font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">with us</i><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lucida Grande;"> in trouble (91:15) and has</span><i style="color: #333333; font-family: 'Lucida Grande';"> ultimate</i><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lucida Grande;"> comfort and perfection—</span><i style="color: #333333; font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">Heaven</i><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Lucida Grande;">, where no bad will befall—ready
for us (91:16). Christ's death gives us the chance to be delivered from death, and whatever happens here, we know we have the opportunity of being forever in His light (56:13). So I have to pray for my trust in Salvation to be solid and pray
safety over those I love and pray for freedom from fear with words that echo one of the most honest men in scriptures</span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'Lucida Grande';">: “Lord, I believe—help Thou my unbelief” (Mark
9:24).</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'Lucida Grande';"><br /></span>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: xx-small;">this post is linked up with</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'Lucida Grande'; font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
http://www.lovingourjourney.com/<br />
<br /></div>
</div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-84599761049707866192012-08-17T09:18:00.002-05:002012-08-17T09:18:49.985-05:00James 3:13<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiyF4cKqB33P6s3FkdmN4EWuooIpxLujuP6-u0T8JBIqup8dgmpHLpEns_2ne9hQiNbH0dM7M0a4DfpQwxPvba669uP177EbLBbAH5RvwRVNMeU4oB1AJyvXGy7j8R3UGjYBGwJBHt4OWe/s1600/two+kinds+of+wisdom.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiyF4cKqB33P6s3FkdmN4EWuooIpxLujuP6-u0T8JBIqup8dgmpHLpEns_2ne9hQiNbH0dM7M0a4DfpQwxPvba669uP177EbLBbAH5RvwRVNMeU4oB1AJyvXGy7j8R3UGjYBGwJBHt4OWe/s320/two+kinds+of+wisdom.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">Thinking this morning about the phrase "actions speak louder than words," but I feel like the James 3:13 (above) brings a new phrase we should live by: "actions and words must align." </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">My words cannot distract from my Christian life any more than my lifestyle distract from my testimony. Why is it, further verses also question, that we find it so easy to spew out negativity and filth? </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">I think it is because we must be letting those things creep into our hearts some way from somewhere. We need to pin point the areas of our lives that breed these evils that tend to show themselves through our words. I am trying to think today of what those things are in my life. What can I replace them with? I cannot leave a void--my heart craves to be full of something. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">What can I fill it with?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">this post is linked up with</span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>
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<a href="http://rachelmariemartin.blogspot.com/search/label/friday%20favorite%20things" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="friday favorite things | finding joy" hspace="none" src="http://i617.photobucket.com/albums/tt255/ElvishAuthoress/fridayfavoritethings.png" vspace="none" /></a><a href="http://www.homesanctuary.com/rachelanne/" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img src="http://i190.photobucket.com/albums/z209/rachelanneridge/Picture2.png " /></a><a href="http://www.beholdingglory.com/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank" title="Beholding Glory"><img alt="Beholding Glory" src="http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o304/laurakrokos/fff1.jpg" style="border: none;" /></a></div>
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herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-80420678747899366992012-08-13T08:59:00.001-05:002012-08-14T10:02:43.434-05:00My Grandmother's Legacy<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 13.5pt;">I am part
of a prayer group, and each Sunday I reflect on and pray about Heaven. I've
been thinking of Heaven a lot lately, and my grandmother's passing last week
has only further fueled my ponderings.</span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">At my grandmother's funeral, her brother-in-law
(a preacher) talked about the generations she has left behind, the legacy of
Lola Bell—it is a fine legacy. We have some oddities here and there, but we are
all believers raising our families in Christ, and that is something my grandmother
was proud of. </span><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Her brother-in-law also talked about my
grandmother's little girl, who died after only a few hours of life, and how
they will get to be reunited. And a couple people at the funeral mentioned that
we are sad because we will miss her presence in our life—not because of any
fear about her being gone f</span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">orever.<br />
<br />
I feel Heaven is something I struggle with, to be honest with you all—my
grandmother has been in decline for a while, and I've wished Heaven for her—so
I know that my deep heart <i>knows</i> there is a Heaven, a place I <i>knew</i> she
could go and finally have peace again. But lately the idea of getting old feels
threatening to me rather than welcoming. My knee is bothering me and may need
surgery, my grandmother passed (my third grandparent to leave this earth), and
I turn 30 this year. My mortality seems so real.<br />
<br />
But there is immortality in Christ. My prayer right now, today...this week, is
for us to have an unshakeable faith in knowing of that immortality, and a peace
that grows from that—and lives that reflect that knowledge and press to share
the peace and hope of our Savior.</span><span style="font-family: inherit, serif; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; mso-line-height-alt: 12.75pt;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">My
grandmother's life has also made me think a lot lately about how to make this
true in my life: "this is my story, this is my song: praising my Savior all
the day long" (Fanny Crosby). The song is "Blessed Assurance,"
which is one of the things I want most in life. So does the chorus give us the
secret: that giving our lives to Christ will give us the assurance of His love
and presence and of Heaven, which is the ultimate example of His love (in that
His death makes it possible for us to go there)?</span><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Married for 61 years, faithfully following my preaching grandfather through various mission fields as a united team, Lola
Bell Carter Hilliard was an excellent example to me of giving her life away.
The past two weeks I've felt her spirit pushing me to do the same. I haven't
figured out exactly how God wishes me to do so, but I am spending the entire
week in prayer for my purpose to become obvious to me. I've come to these truths
so far:</span><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: inherit; mso-fareast-font-family: inherit;"> 1)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I need
to give thanks more.</span><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="background: white; margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 12.75pt; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Wingdings; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Wingdings; mso-fareast-font-family: Wingdings;">ü<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Give glory to God in everything you do, <i>giving thanks</i> (Colossians
3:17). </span><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="background: white; margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 12.75pt; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Wingdings; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Wingdings; mso-fareast-font-family: Wingdings;">ü<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Don't be anxious: bring everything to God <i>in
thanksgiving </i>(Philippians 4:6).</span><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: inherit; mso-fareast-font-family: inherit;"> 2)<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;"> </span></span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I need
to look outward more than inward, finding ways to help others in quietness and kindness.</span><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="background: white; margin-left: 1.0in; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 12.75pt; mso-list: l0 level2 lfo1; text-indent: -.25in;">
<span style="color: #333333; font-family: Wingdings; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Wingdings; mso-fareast-font-family: Wingdings;">ü<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Love others as I have loved you, and in this action, people will
know you are Mine (John 13:34-35).</span><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="background: white; color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I am resolved no longer to linger,</span><span style="font-size: 13.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Charmed by the world’s delight,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Things that are higher, things that are nobler,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">These have allured my sight.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I will hasten to Him, hasten so glad and free;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Jesus, greatest, highest, I will come to Thee.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">I will hasten, hasten to Him, hasten so glad and free;<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Jesus, Jesus, greatest, highest, I will come to Thee.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: "inherit","serif"; font-size: 13.5pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Palmer Hartsough<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; text-align: left;">I keep hearing I look like her: the only better compliment I can think of is hearing I am like her. She was true beauty.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">this post is linked up with</span></div>
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<a href="http://www.joleneengle.org/" title="The Alabaster Jar"><img alt="The Alabaster Jar" src="http://i1125.photobucket.com/albums/l599/joleneengle/maritalonenessmondaysjarpinkbuttoncopy.png" style="border: none;" /></a> <a href="http://www.thebettermom.com/"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWF890Pt3eqkoNmBeqvaEykI29h66ZzZHiNCgH9BzcDvmirIGsXcRg7-ia6Cn3ahT5MrFGqxWqRQwCgCtsyiqx5kaQ3VtLqQUt577AGnp1Lq0R7y2PETUP521E6dJwjDR5_8D3wcdVnYs/s1600/BetterMondaysLinkup.jpg" /></a> </div>
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<a href="http://www.time-warp-wife.blogspot.com/"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG08-3dOJUlxWpyv2Bly56srMOqJaDZuko4F_TCEtIk_jdYKQpuH6muK6d58cJQncxNo-5EIo_WND7a0YDuHhMD0ZxkpyGbYIjKfEbHYa-e7fz2l7gONL4RSUDlXaPCbiiXPy776phzyY/s1600/TuesdaysButton.jpg" /></a> <a href="http://frominmatestoplaydates.com/" title="From Inmates to Playdates"> <img alt="From Inmates to Playdates" border="0" src="http://www.frominmatestoplaydates.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/inmates-button-125.jpg" style="text-align: center;" title="From Inmates to Playdates" /></a> <a border="0" href="http://www.aboverubies.net/search/label/Domestically%20Divine%20Link-Up" target="_blank"><img src="http://i669.photobucket.com/albums/vv54/jasminecucuta/Jasminesdomesticallydivinebuttongood.png" /></a></div>
herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-70637973400469982052012-07-30T08:38:00.003-05:002012-07-30T08:45:18.346-05:00Marriage Now; Heaven Later<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">I've been thinking about Heaven lately--partially because I turn the big 3-0 this year (yikes!), and partially because my grandmother is nearing her return Home. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">Of all my goals in life--the top ones should be</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">1) to please Jesus,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">2) to get to Heaven,</span><br />
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #333333; display: inline; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; text-align: left;">3) to do all within my power to help my family get to Heaven, and<br />4) to help guide and direct others to Heaven through the example I live.<br /><br />I'm reading <i>Sacred Marriage </i>by Gary Thomas right now--which so far is an incredible inspiration. It is making me think about how my marriage connects to all of those items. Jesus is pleased by my "sticking it out," keeping my promise keeps me from sin, my family is affected by my decision to stay married, and the world can see a strong, lasting marriage as something different in the world--which can point them to the Savior.<br /><br />While marriage has its dog days, we are called to be holy in this beautiful life that isn't always beautiful--so that we can make it to the place that is Always Beautiful.</span><br />
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I keep feeling so inspired by different quotes from Thomas's book. </div>
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During naptime this past Friday, I treated myself to a reading break. Yes--I see the irony in the book choices. Perhaps Hemingway should have read <i>Sacred Marriage</i> instead of having four wives?</div>
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More excellent quotes are posted below. </div>
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On July 21<sup>st</sup>, 1899, barely making it in before
the turn of the century, the writer who is credited with defining his
generation and changing American literature was born, and on July 21<sup>st</sup>,
2012—113 years later—I stood in the very room where he was born.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Ernest Hemingway has been a favorite of mine since I wrote a
small thesis on him during my graduate studies. With the popularity of <i>The Paris Wife </i>by Paula McLain and Woody
Allen’s <i>Midnight in Paris, </i>Hemingway
has been thrust, once again, in to the spotlight of current culture. He was a
man known for his bravery, manliness, larger-than-life personality, writing
talent, and many wives. Beneath all of that was a cat enthusiast, an interesting lover-fighter
mix, a well-traveled adventurer, and—in his heart—a sensitive observer of the
nature of human kind. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="http://omorecollegeofdesign.tumblr.com/post/28063004367/happy-birthday-dear-hemingway">Click here for the rest of my guest blog</a> on O'More College of Design's travel blog. </div>
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<br />herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-91726921164109954562012-07-27T19:49:00.003-05:002012-07-27T19:56:21.203-05:00Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones—and Words Can Always Hurt Me<br />
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“Actions don’t always speak louder than words” (“The 5 Love
Languages”), especially if your love language is Words of Affirmation. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Our homes are like our own little city or community, and the last
thing we want to do is set our family “aflame” by ridiculing each other (Proverbs
29:8). <o:p></o:p></div>
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“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me”
is an untrue chant. Words do hurt—both those meant to sting and those meant to
tease. Most humor comes from a true feeling, and teasing someone can be a sign
of defensiveness, insecurity, or cruelty. We don’t want any of those motives in
our homes.<o:p></o:p></div>
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My brother and I weren’t allowed to make fun of each other; our
treatment of one another was supposed to reflect respect, and I am grateful for
my parents’ institution of this ideal. Teasing too often hits on a painful
nerve; teasers too often know just the right words that hurt, though they hide
it under the guise of a joke. Taunting can bring anger, which the Proverbs say
the wise “turn away” (Proverbs 29: 8).<o:p></o:p></div>
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Our homes should be a place of safety: a place each member goes to be
uplifted and encouraged. Life is hard—our treatment of those we love shouldn’t
be.<o:p></o:p></div>
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On the other hand, kind words are the best gift you can give someone
with this love language. “Flattery will get you everywhere,” I part-joke. Words
of Affirmation is my top love language, and sincere compliments and praise speak
love and respect—“I know who you are, I see what you do, and I admire it and
you.” <o:p></o:p></div>
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My mom isn't one to lavish me with acclaim. When she wrote the note below on some poetry I have been working to publish, I knew she meant it. High praise from someone who is always honest with you carries a lot of weight. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgglLQUnbaNTLUZDFf4vZfrAdh_mq5bOAo20V1tc2zHuPknvyVp4-nkwWb7NbJahd6jy37MCqig-y45biYqA9zKmO59K4mAquxDNLyCthpLXtkbf4zy_xy50YOAj12_z9oGNyXbViXYWgiv/s1600/amaze.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgglLQUnbaNTLUZDFf4vZfrAdh_mq5bOAo20V1tc2zHuPknvyVp4-nkwWb7NbJahd6jy37MCqig-y45biYqA9zKmO59K4mAquxDNLyCthpLXtkbf4zy_xy50YOAj12_z9oGNyXbViXYWgiv/s320/amaze.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<o:p>If someone you love is Words of Affirmation, be incredibly conscious of your vocabulary. Perhaps it isn't in your nature to use words of praise, but you will have to make that effort. Also, remember that we affirmation-needers delight in hearing the actual words <i>I adore you. </i>Grab a thesaurus, and learn new ways to say it every day!</o:p></div>
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<o:p> </o:p><span style="background-color: white; color: #323232; font-family: inherit; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">each post in this series</span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/five-love-languages-series-introduction.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Introduction</a></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/considering-acts-of-service.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Acts of Service</a></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://each%20post%20in%20this%20series%20introduction%20acts%20of%20service%20physical%20touch%20quality%20time%20gifts%20words%20of%20affirmation/" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Physical Touch</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/quality-time-together.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Quality Time</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/what-well-thought-out-gift-says.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Gifts</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bonesand.html">Words of Affirmation</a></span></div>
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<o:p>The book my grandfather, father, and I wrote in reflection of the Proverbs is finally here! You can click on the photo below to go to the O'More Publishing website, and then scroll down to <i>Proverbs through the Generations </i>to purchase. Proceeds go to scholarships for O'More College of Design students. </o:p></div>
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<a href="http://www.omorecollege.edu/content/publishing-our-books.html"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs17V69RkVggWTJ_JG1yIVI1PgsUX7qQ65RlQrBvUyhhKWDVaw9RwNwk2t0tc7-PI3PC3e0VFhEa46YZ3vWBrFCe4f8c2dLUR62Bd2977tBk3Zvgbmn9f5Tw1dEkQwHD8cxa_2nWkPYlfF/s1600/proverbs.jpeg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">Chapman, Gary. <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i>Chicago:
Northfield, 1995. Print.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">“The 5 Love Langugages.” <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i>Moody
Publishers. n.d. Web. 11 May 2012</span><o:p></o:p><br />
<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: xx-small;">this post is linked up with</span></div>
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<a href="http://www.lovingourjourney.com/"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5mj2_o6vQ18CAUr_GGXlZdcdRRUilXw_zltXvppaqo5HWbOBChAecGk4ySOToPJuCaiTPmldqZvH1HxPYI7zgtP_FdYI2tdzwm3DphdxaCDtzDxA2xel2-6fK4gR3ddxcShVrDDwNuJl5/s1600/faith.gif" /></a><a href="http://www.beholdingglory.com/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank" title="Beholding Glory"><img alt="Beholding Glory" src="http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o304/laurakrokos/fff1.jpg" style="border: none;" /></a><a href="http://www.yourthrivingfamily.com/search/label/Weekend%20Whatever" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt="http://www.yourthrivingfamily.com/" height="125" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKbbmhpncEJDYclkS26tyjB0vsq8mwMovT9ZpGBK4fHZlEw82Rt8AfXf-l8mIvyRxFVOXbf1lVXbqiYj5Wo_DcUT9cd4MbgNFQsi9fjLNrvBRf5rNG1TIza36V2-9rp8TfzRoZNxAG80k/s800/link5.jpg" width="125" /></a><a href="http://rachelmariemartin.blogspot.com/search/label/friday%20favorite%20things" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="friday favorite things | finding joy" hspace="none" src="http://i617.photobucket.com/albums/tt255/ElvishAuthoress/fridayfavoritethings.png" vspace="none" /></a></div>
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<br />herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-43050004306601749602012-07-25T08:30:00.000-05:002012-07-27T19:50:49.110-05:00What a Well-Thought-Out Gift Says<br />
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">If your love language is Gifts, it doesn't mean you are superficial. A well-thought-out gift is the key: it communicates knowledge of the recipient. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">My top love language is Words of Affirmation (which I will discuss last), and Touch, Quality Time, and Gifts are all tied for my second place. I am slightly obsessed with buying presents for people. We re-assessed our budget this past spring, and I realized I needed to add a Present Line. I knew I was going to buy gifts each month, so I capped the amount of money I could spend this way. I explained to someone, "Saying I cannot buy presents for people is like telling me I cannot say, 'I love you.'"</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">I would define a "good gift" as one that meets the following criteria:</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">1) something I've wanted for a while (communicating you listen to and respect my needs and desires),</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">2) something to add to a collection I have (communicating you are observant of my likes),</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">3) something that reminds you of me--that represents me well (communicating you know me as a person and friend), and/or</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">4) something I wouldn't get for myself but want (communicating you think I'm worth it).</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Giving a good gift requires attention to detail, which is why this love language means more than throwing money at a person. Though it isn't limited to special occasions (as giving a random present is an excellent idea for a Gifts friend or spouse), special occasions carry an extra weight of importance. Try as I might not to care, anniversaries, birthdays, and other holidays are overwhelmingly significant to me. The <i>actual day </i>needs to be celebrated. (With babies around, I know we might not be able to go <i>out </i>on the actual day, but I still need fanfare, even if at home.) If I say I don't want a present, that is my practical side taking over. You can ignore her.</span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">I have to reiterate that the money spent isn't is important. When we were dating, Jay used to pick a leaf off of a bush every time he walked to my dorm to pick me up. Each time he handed me that free, random item, it was a little green sign of "I was thinking about you. You are important." If someone you love is Gifts, open your ears (perhaps keep a little notebook of ideas when you hear a desire communicated), and learn to love on a different level. </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span></div>
<br />
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<o:p> </o:p><span style="background-color: white; color: #323232; font-family: inherit; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">each post in this series</span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/five-love-languages-series-introduction.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Introduction</a></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/considering-acts-of-service.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Acts of Service</a></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://each%20post%20in%20this%20series%20introduction%20acts%20of%20service%20physical%20touch%20quality%20time%20gifts%20words%20of%20affirmation/" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Physical Touch</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/quality-time-together.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Quality Time</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/what-well-thought-out-gift-says.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Gifts</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bonesand.html">Words of Affirmation</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">My father gives intensely wonderful presents: see the three images below (which were all <i>for no reason </i>gifts).</span></div>
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One day the note below was on an old typewriter Dad bought me and left in my office.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrWX4xRViphbrpt7h_1AEDCER1nup9eKJFNXVmJz2uFVNsk2sPq-z6_i2NhqHFUvfyCG6sonNSt_igLHeY6e9Foa7WxYpKIlaOrA47Stn9IUHfAbSrYNzJl9ccZyGrNPlNKD_vSAyd2agL/s1600/dadnote.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrWX4xRViphbrpt7h_1AEDCER1nup9eKJFNXVmJz2uFVNsk2sPq-z6_i2NhqHFUvfyCG6sonNSt_igLHeY6e9Foa7WxYpKIlaOrA47Stn9IUHfAbSrYNzJl9ccZyGrNPlNKD_vSAyd2agL/s320/dadnote.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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Jay got me a stamp for my vast book collection. I've wanted this for more than ten years.</div>
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My mom gives great "I saw this and thought of you" presents.</div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Chapman, Gary. <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Chicago: Northfield, 1995. Print.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">“The 5 Love Langugages.” <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Moody Publishers. n.d. Web. 11 May 2012.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="background-color: white;">this post is linked up with</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://womenlivingwell.org/category/women-living-well-wednesdays/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img src="http://i457.photobucket.com/albums/qq297/courtneylivingwell/LivingWell.png" /></a><a href="http://www.aholyexperience.com/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="holy experience" src="http://i534.photobucket.com/albums/ee349/GDest07/ann%20voskamp/HEbutton.png" title="holy experience" /></a><a href="http://newlifesteward.com/tag/wip-wednesday/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img alt="WIPWednesday" height="125" src=" http://newlifesteward.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/WIPWedButton2-1.png" width="125" /></a></div>
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<center></center>herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-55148075810172974572012-07-22T18:33:00.000-05:002012-07-27T19:51:01.173-05:00Quality Time Together<div style="color: #323232; line-height: 18px; text-align: center;">
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<span style="background-color: white; text-align: left;">Jonas, my nine-month-old, can be bubbly and joyful…until
you walk out of the room. Jay, Jonas, and I went on a short trip to Minneapolis
and left Jack (who doesn’t fly free any more) with my mom. When we came home, I
was surprised to see how happy Jonas was to be with Jack again. His face light
up when he saw his brother, and the moodiness he gave us the whole trip was
gone. Jonas missed Jack. Adorable.</span><br />
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If your language is Quality Time, “nothing says, ‘I love
you’ like full, undivided attention” (“The 5 Love Languages”). If Jonas
continues to show signs that he is Quality Time, I’ll have to make sure my busy
do-twelve-things-at-once nature allows for some focus-only-on-Jonas time
allotment. He isn’t happy resting his head against me while I write like Jack
(Physical Touch boy) is—he wants to join in with the typing. <o:p></o:p></div>
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As I have looked at this love language, I’ve concluded that
it is divided into at least two subcategories: quality conversation and quality
activities. I tend to fall into the
first; my husband and one of my best friends fall into the latter. I’d love to
sit around with a cup of tea and chat. Jay and my dear friend Megan want to go
places and do things. I’ve also discovered I enjoy activities that are
conversation-friendly: light hiking, shopping, going out to eat, playing Mah Jongg….<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisv7PnGYIiDIoRsxGG2IE21ayVw-fCrvCaNTcMHGg1DcsR6HBzwGjG7kDz9491pJeww2J00a6YY_8ysegan7N88H6-cey-c84bjfn-bC_oxYfZOFY_dulRUbBXgHRSk55mdIAeLNGWCIE-/s1600/tea.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisv7PnGYIiDIoRsxGG2IE21ayVw-fCrvCaNTcMHGg1DcsR6HBzwGjG7kDz9491pJeww2J00a6YY_8ysegan7N88H6-cey-c84bjfn-bC_oxYfZOFY_dulRUbBXgHRSk55mdIAeLNGWCIE-/s320/tea.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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If your love language isn’t Quality Time, or if it is but
your interests differ from your spouse’s, then you will need to re-wire your
definition of “waste of time.” My dad, a “nearness” and quality conversation
type, wants to sit on the couch with my mom and watch a favorite British show.
She is Acts of Service, and it is hard for her to <i>sit </i>when that To Do List seems unending. And though I am Quality
Time, since my husband likes sports (watching and playing) and I don’t, I have
to stretch myself beyond feeling like baseball is a waste of time when I have a
book I want to read or ideas to reflect upon. <o:p></o:p></div>
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With Megan, and other Quality Time friends who like that
time to be in <i>action, </i>I’m trying to
find activities that stretch my physical comfort zone while still lending
themselves to decent conversation.</div>
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<o:p> </o:p><span style="background-color: white; color: #323232; font-family: inherit; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">each post in this series</span></div>
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<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/five-love-languages-series-introduction.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Introduction</a></div>
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<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/considering-acts-of-service.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Acts of Service</a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://each%20post%20in%20this%20series%20introduction%20acts%20of%20service%20physical%20touch%20quality%20time%20gifts%20words%20of%20affirmation/" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Physical Touch</a></span></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/quality-time-together.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Quality Time</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/what-well-thought-out-gift-says.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Gifts</a></span></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bonesand.html">Words of Affirmation</a></span></div>
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<span style="color: #323232;"><span style="line-height: 18px;">Some Quality Time I've greatly enjoyed this weekend: attending a birthday party for Ernest Hemingway in his birth town of Oak Park, Illinois. </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNf8uuXyxI3uVJFAq3cM2wsAYCxgPITrUQ0pQ8Q7JgsWwXZjPzfH2fLUhIpXHyk0F5W8vEcygPYvRVhQ8rF_KNJV3ygWcIKzJfPJIgKlL6rIsXrdgix9hs5MPyPsgWbKEmIP-HTSS6mmQl/s1600/hemingway+b'day.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNf8uuXyxI3uVJFAq3cM2wsAYCxgPITrUQ0pQ8Q7JgsWwXZjPzfH2fLUhIpXHyk0F5W8vEcygPYvRVhQ8rF_KNJV3ygWcIKzJfPJIgKlL6rIsXrdgix9hs5MPyPsgWbKEmIP-HTSS6mmQl/s320/hemingway+b'day.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Chapman, Gary. <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Chicago: Northfield, 1995. Print.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">“The 5 Love Langugages.” <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Moody Publishers. n.d. Web. 11 May 2012.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="background-color: white;">this post is linked up with</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.thebettermom.com/"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWF890Pt3eqkoNmBeqvaEykI29h66ZzZHiNCgH9BzcDvmirIGsXcRg7-ia6Cn3ahT5MrFGqxWqRQwCgCtsyiqx5kaQ3VtLqQUt577AGnp1Lq0R7y2PETUP521E6dJwjDR5_8D3wcdVnYs/s1600/BetterMondaysLinkup.jpg" /></a> <a href="http://www.carissagraham.com/search/label/miscellany%20monday"><img align="center" alt="miscellany monday at lowercase letters" hspace="none" src=" http://i617.photobucket.com/albums/tt255/ElvishAuthoress/MMbutton3.png " vspace="none" /></a> <a href="http://www.raisingarrows.net/" target="_blank" title="http://www.raisingarrows.net"> <img src="http://www.raisingarrows.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/125x125.jpg" width="150px" /></a></div>herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-35770932355201091492012-07-17T07:52:00.004-05:002012-07-27T19:51:14.639-05:00Physical Touch<br />
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Hugs, pats on the back, hand holding—all show “excitement,
concern, care, and love” to someone who is Physical Touch (“The 5 Love
Languages”). As I mentioned in the previous post, sometimes women jump to the
conclusion that they are Acts of Service because they enjoy help around the
house. I think some men assume they are Physical Touch because they like…you
know: marital relations.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">If Physical Touch is your love language, you desire for
touch will go beyond sexual intimacy. You will find yourself hugging friends,
patting people on the back, roughhousing with your kids, sitting as close as
you can on the couch with someone special. One of the ways I know my husband
really <i>is </i>Physical Touch is because
he touches even his guy friends often: from hugs to shoves. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Dr. Chapman says it’s hard to pinpoint a child’s love
language when he or she is under two, and that it is important to speak all
languages to your kids as they form their language. Still, Jack (my
two-and-a-half-year-old) has been obsessed with physical contact since he was
born. The colicky baby needed to be held close, bounced, and whacked slightly-beyond-gently on the back for most hours of the day and too many hours of the
night. These days, he adores hugs and kisses: from family, friends, strange
babies, and even “beautiful girls” he doesn’t yet know but wants to. (I’m
already praying God puts purity high in this boy’s heart!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Once I was talking about this love language in a class. A
student and I were both wondering why, scoring so high in Physical Touch, we
are often reserved. We wondered if, mixed with our introvert status, we were naturally more cautious. She explained she held Physical Touch in such a high regard that
it took someone being quite dear to her (“in my inner circle”) to get her love
in that way. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">A discussion with your spouse or some time thinking over how
you treat a friend is in order if you aren’t both Physical Touch. Any time you are speaking outside of your
native tongue, you will find you have to make a <i>concerted effort. </i>Physical Touch is no different. Rethink where you
sit as you watch television together, hold hands when you say grace, hug when
he comes home from work, kiss when she has washed the dishes. With Physical
Touch, distance can bring resistance, and nearness can mean dearness. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> Jack hugging his best friend Malachi</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR3jtlLFffdk4DiVWFs9tLN3efNuBkXd34NlQiIxCsEwgxrNYcfeooObtMIiYMfIZ839Uvndd12Y8R8_QB54XAPiq8ti4zDoqQwbuxHoqXsfxJy0tP6OnTMhef5vWh02SsZZSC4pbhUDMt/s1600/IMG_1908.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR3jtlLFffdk4DiVWFs9tLN3efNuBkXd34NlQiIxCsEwgxrNYcfeooObtMIiYMfIZ839Uvndd12Y8R8_QB54XAPiq8ti4zDoqQwbuxHoqXsfxJy0tP6OnTMhef5vWh02SsZZSC4pbhUDMt/s320/IMG_1908.JPG" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> sweet brothers</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSkBTGzHAqr-MDk2wtvEwq9LZKDh9KxMvN1U32NDb2xGMtPvewxNLacJDUtiPB58oohxtsnFfMXGaJwH2DP8pr5SaacBEKBj65pjnffGZM-ILqyNJponOXbFyl2IJcO-wVD0p3XNJftTPM/s1600/IMG_6674.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSkBTGzHAqr-MDk2wtvEwq9LZKDh9KxMvN1U32NDb2xGMtPvewxNLacJDUtiPB58oohxtsnFfMXGaJwH2DP8pr5SaacBEKBj65pjnffGZM-ILqyNJponOXbFyl2IJcO-wVD0p3XNJftTPM/s320/IMG_6674.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> giving his Nana Sugie and unsolicited hug</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw64OQfHT_kaLWOsXoBUpD4AMvil7XJLaKoLL9WjWKEO9zDf47cZ1K_0A82WSA8aU8udhpG70Lb6Ga7DUjSq3Gww7vcs8kKmZFejTQDVlelSAJFP41DTdfHNpEd3r0qT5pxutzwDHA8ufF/s1600/IMG_4550.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw64OQfHT_kaLWOsXoBUpD4AMvil7XJLaKoLL9WjWKEO9zDf47cZ1K_0A82WSA8aU8udhpG70Lb6Ga7DUjSq3Gww7vcs8kKmZFejTQDVlelSAJFP41DTdfHNpEd3r0qT5pxutzwDHA8ufF/s320/IMG_4550.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"> one of my mom's favorite photos of Jack randomly kissing his cousin Charlie</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibB4u1wxXzIQIXGXoNOQpDRlxr1dd3_C03-fabtPCftbFx59jPlRufUX1MtTQxZQXlz8cIWZlFcF5PxmdWxjwpFrbFlr3-fUXpWjCt5GEPNlQTo0pRPJUjv3kufGKwT1PrZgY4d9nJc3Tp/s1600/IMG_4551.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibB4u1wxXzIQIXGXoNOQpDRlxr1dd3_C03-fabtPCftbFx59jPlRufUX1MtTQxZQXlz8cIWZlFcF5PxmdWxjwpFrbFlr3-fUXpWjCt5GEPNlQTo0pRPJUjv3kufGKwT1PrZgY4d9nJc3Tp/s320/IMG_4551.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">an old favorite of Jack and Jonas</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqA4bB_9er9Qy_FD7SUOln9lRq5WT5Ojj_SBFO11X1TSQVxCJAYIoAbAjHJcH5hOGmzsjIlvtu12KIT-4iPxHym4ZZtrAqsxFRy_Rtkk9fnYEKAvjam8YCBJZv3HERJxE9XByMZ1qbzyyI/s1600/IMG_2340.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqA4bB_9er9Qy_FD7SUOln9lRq5WT5Ojj_SBFO11X1TSQVxCJAYIoAbAjHJcH5hOGmzsjIlvtu12KIT-4iPxHym4ZZtrAqsxFRy_Rtkk9fnYEKAvjam8YCBJZv3HERJxE9XByMZ1qbzyyI/s320/IMG_2340.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Before bed each night, Jack and I snuggle in my bed and watch cartoons.</span><br />
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<o:p> </o:p><span style="background-color: white; color: #323232; font-family: inherit; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">each post in this series</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/five-love-languages-series-introduction.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Introduction</a></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/considering-acts-of-service.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Acts of Service</a></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://each%20post%20in%20this%20series%20introduction%20acts%20of%20service%20physical%20touch%20quality%20time%20gifts%20words%20of%20affirmation/" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Physical Touch</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/quality-time-together.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Quality Time</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/what-well-thought-out-gift-says.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Gifts</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bonesand.html">Words of Affirmation</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Chapman, Gary. <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Chicago: Northfield, 1995. Print.</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">“The 5 Love Langugages.” <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Moody Publishers. n.d. Web. 11 May 2012.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="background-color: white;">this post is linked up with</span></span></div>
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<a href="http://www.lovingourjourney.com/"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQLl4SjaJ7fplk5PK2Dfwz4gVAeEGyZAIoRYvW5hB9sfox6oD86L7YqJJywjF-mUcZx8V0R9x7VXwUApcSQWyMzSpV7zA34ckuaoUP3dqphOY2oH8r4JflUVg6Ak0NVRGEh9MMIx5_MyaB/s1600/parent.gif" /></a><a href="http://rachelmariemartin.blogspot.com/search/label/friday%20favorite%20things" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="friday favorite things | finding joy" hspace="none" src="http://i617.photobucket.com/albums/tt255/ElvishAuthoress/fridayfavoritethings.png" vspace="none" /></a></div>herejessahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12345566309593367554noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4093223077470044132.post-19866613448261432992012-07-17T07:26:00.001-05:002012-07-27T19:51:32.444-05:00Considering Acts of Service<br />
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<span style="background-color: white;">The words an Acts of Service person wants to hear most are
these: “Let me do that for you” (“The 5 Love Languages”). Making more work or promising
to help and then not can bring hurt feelings (“The 5 Love Languages”).</span></div>
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I decided to start with this language because it is my
lowest. I thought for a long time it was tied with the rest, but I decided to
take the “For Singles” <a href="http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/">quiz on the 5 Love Languages website</a> and got a <i>zero. </i><o:p></o:p></div>
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I think women can falsely believe this is our love language
because we feel pleased when our husbands pitch in around the house. As
progressive as we are, women, in general, are still often expected to take care
of the majority of that work. I don’t say it to be controversial—I say it because
I see it over and over and over again: in my generation, in ones before me, and
in younger generations as well. “We’ve come a long way baby…” but some mindsets
are still lingering. I also don’t say it to make some sweeping statement about
who should be doing what in a home, but I do think a conversation on roles and
responsibilities would be valuable. <o:p></o:p></div>
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If you aren’t married yet, you can watch how your possible
in-laws handle things, or ask your fiancé how things were handled in his or her
house. Often we mimic the setting we grew up in. <o:p></o:p></div>
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One difference in the traditional mindset may arise when love languages are considered.
Whether or not your father-in-law helped around the household chores, if your
husband’s love language is Acts of Service, he might be more obliging to do
these tasks because he is saying “I love you” with every sweep of the broom,
every folding of the socks. In turn, your mopping, vacuuming, wiping, and
cleansing will mean a lot more to him than you simply doing what needs to be
done.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Men, if your wife’s love language is Acts of Service, then
your helping around the house is <i>far </i>more
than a comment on your stance on feminism. It actually has nothing to do with
that at all, but everything to do with learning to show your affection for her
in one of the ways she needs it most. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Just because I scored low on Acts of Service doesn’t mean I
don’t need help. In fact, I find myself getting incredibly frustrated when this
language is left unspoken. Why? Because, as I
wrote before in this post, marriage is a partnership, and with us both working
outside the home, I need us both to be working equally <i>inside </i>the home as well. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Besides taking the quiz on the book’s website, you can
consider this question: do you feel loved, appreciated, and cared for when
someone helps you with chores, lawn work, cooking, or cleaning? Do you feel
neglected and extraordinarily frustrated when these things are ignored, or when
it feels that each of these areas of work is left up to you?<o:p></o:p></div>
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Here is a question to discuss with your spouse: what are
three things you’d love to have done around the house without having to mention
it? Make sure you are careful with your wording. “You are such a mess; please
just pick up your socks for once in your life,” isn’t the best way to say it.
“I love it when you pick up your socks,” is much more positive. Once you’ve
come up with some answers, it will be time to put intention into action.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1OV32JiVAGSiKnaDqSYgXXs6qbqDTSQ12ZpZClCPOJ4EvwGdcYQlxpumgCpFVkmsfGdjghBqy1EJyr4NwciicVpamGEvrqnCUq5p8unFPsn62tm_NV4hjBYZgHjQbKIVTKn5rWqKOxnZO/s1600/IMG_2175.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1OV32JiVAGSiKnaDqSYgXXs6qbqDTSQ12ZpZClCPOJ4EvwGdcYQlxpumgCpFVkmsfGdjghBqy1EJyr4NwciicVpamGEvrqnCUq5p8unFPsn62tm_NV4hjBYZgHjQbKIVTKn5rWqKOxnZO/s320/IMG_2175.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<o:p> </o:p><span style="background-color: white; color: #323232; font-family: inherit; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">each post in this series</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/five-love-languages-series-introduction.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Introduction</a></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/considering-acts-of-service.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Acts of Service</a></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://each%20post%20in%20this%20series%20introduction%20acts%20of%20service%20physical%20touch%20quality%20time%20gifts%20words%20of%20affirmation/" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Physical Touch</a></span></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/quality-time-together.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Quality Time</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/what-well-thought-out-gift-says.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Gifts</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bonesand.html">Words of Affirmation</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">Chapman, Gary. <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Chicago:
Northfield, 1995. Print.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">“The 5 Love Langugages.” <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Moody
Publishers. n.d. Web. 11 May 2012.</span></span></div>
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Self assessment of the Five Love Languages (Words of
Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical
Touch), can improve our relationships and communication skills: this is a
thesis statement I have used in a presentation on Dr. Gary Chapman’s book <i>The 5 Love Languages.</i> <o:p></o:p></div>
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If you haven’t heard of this book, it is an excellent read.
He has editions devoted to how you communicate with your teens, children, spouse,
friends….but, really, if you are able to read one copy and think of how to
translate that information into all of your relationships, then you don’t need
to feel overwhelmed by the amount of reading that seems to lie ahead in order
to help you say “I love you” the way the people you love need to hear it. <o:p></o:p></div>
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If you’ve ever felt as though you were pouring a lot of
energy in a relationship but getting nothing in return, it is possible one or
both of you have different love languages—that you express love and need it
expressed to you in different ways. For some reason, I’ve noticed that our
dearest friends often have our same love languages while our spouses have
different ones. (Do we want to be forever encouraged by our friends and
frustrated by our lover? Do we think the “two becoming one” reference to in
Genesis 2:24 means our trying to marry two differing personalities in an
effort to make one complete person?)<o:p></o:p></div>
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As I mentioned in the first sentence, self assessment is the
first step. No matter your marital relationship status, knowing your love
language can help you better understand yourself: why you react the way you do
to others. I use this evaluation in several of my classes as self-discovery,
right alongside Myers Briggs personality tests and Howard Gardner Multiple
Intelligences quizzes. Dr. Gary Chapman has its own website with easy quizzes.
If you never have, I encourage you to <a href="http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/">go here</a> to take at least one quiz. Since
I am married, I took the one for wives, but, for curiosity’s sake, I also took the
one for singles. (I wondered if I showed or desired love any differently with
my friends. I’ll share more about those slightly differing results throughout
the series.)<o:p></o:p></div>
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In the quiz, you are asked to pick between a pair of two
phrases that most describes you: you may feel the two phrases (such as you being asked to pick whether “sweet notes from my
husband make me feel good” or “I love my husband’s hugs”) are impossible to
chose from. I usually want to say, “I need both, please, thank you” to every
question. Laughingly (yet somewhat truthfully), I say that I am all five love languages. <o:p></o:p></div>
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“Well, doesn’t that make things easy for your husband?” I’ve
been asked. <o:p></o:p></div>
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“Not really—it means I need all the languages spoken.” <o:p></o:p></div>
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The second step—after taking the quiz, perhaps reading the
book, and then coercing your spouse and best friends to study up with you as well—is to
spend time in pondering and practice in becoming more fluent in the language of
those dear to you. The next five blog posts that I will share over the next two
weeks will look at each language, incorporating stories from my journey with
questions and challenges you can use. <o:p></o:p></div>
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There is no Rosetta Stone, just a mix of trial, error, and
effort. But if you want to get to the core of “I love you,” it’s worth the work.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVpf-PbZtoTbSRXWQskq5o7T3UCO8IlYpEijCGiMkWzWJ3aa1wdmoyW6F3BXkQ-MSsBu1K1pEAzcD4_2l2kTs8ygLdGfpiRb2RuLfpBLM5L-fBEP71b46VdA5WQ4R0EZkzkYj8aj3u69wu/s1600/IMG_6283.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVpf-PbZtoTbSRXWQskq5o7T3UCO8IlYpEijCGiMkWzWJ3aa1wdmoyW6F3BXkQ-MSsBu1K1pEAzcD4_2l2kTs8ygLdGfpiRb2RuLfpBLM5L-fBEP71b46VdA5WQ4R0EZkzkYj8aj3u69wu/s320/IMG_6283.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<o:p> </o:p><span style="background-color: white; color: #323232; font-family: inherit; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">each post in this series</span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/five-love-languages-series-introduction.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Introduction</a></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/considering-acts-of-service.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Acts of Service</a></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://each%20post%20in%20this%20series%20introduction%20acts%20of%20service%20physical%20touch%20quality%20time%20gifts%20words%20of%20affirmation/" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Physical Touch</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/quality-time-together.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Quality Time</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/what-well-thought-out-gift-says.html" style="color: #76177c; text-decoration: none;">Gifts</a></span></div>
<div style="color: #323232; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://herejessa.blogspot.com/2012/07/sticks-and-stones-may-break-my-bonesand.html">Words of Affirmation</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Chapman, Gary. <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Chicago:
Northfield, 1995. Print.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">“The 5 Love Langugages.” <i>The 5 Love Languages. </i><span style="background-color: white;">Moody
Publishers. n.d. Web. 11 May 2012.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: white;">this post is linked up with </span></span></div>
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